Hello and welcome back to another riveting week in 2020. Yes, we're still in bed. Yes, we're still wearing elastic waist pants. And yes, we don't know if that will ever change.
However, we do have some exciting news to share: It's November. Now, you're probably thinking, "Wow thanks, I can read a calendar." But before you call us out for stating the obvious, allow us to expand. November isn't just a month, it's a lifestyle. When the clock went from 11:59 on October 31 to 12:00 on November 1, we put away our pumpkin candles, ate the last of our candy corn and turned off Halloweentown. Now, the house smells like peppermint, we're eating gingerbread cookies and preparing ourselves for Freeform's 25 Days of Christmas. Yes, we're skipping right over Thanksgiving and embracing the holiday spirit like a warm blanket on a snowy night.
So, cue up Mariah Carey's "All I Want for Christmas" and grab yourself a cup of hot chocolate. We just need five minutes of your time to fill you in on everything you missed while hanging the mistletoe. (Too soon? Never.)
Double Tap For The Clapback
Six months after their third split, it seems Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green aren't seeing eye-to-eye as co-parents to Noah, 8, Bodhi, 6, and Journey, 4. So much so that after the actor posted a Halloween snap of him and Journey on Instagram, Megan accused him of using their brood for likes. "I know you love your kids," she commented. "But I don't know why you can't stop using them to posture via Instagram. You're so intoxicated with feeding the pervasive narrative that I'm an absent mother, and you are the perennial, eternally dedicated dad of the year. You have them half of the time. Congratulations, you truly are a remarkable human! Why do you need the Internet to echo back to you what should be inexhaustibly evident in the way your children love you?"
And friendly reminder that this exchange comes after BAG shaded Megan and her new relationship with Machine Gun Kelly. In August, when she described the rapper as her "Achingly Beautiful Boy," her ex took to Instagram to share photos of his sons using the exact. same. caption. Excuse us while we pick our jaws up off the ground.
You're In Big Trouble Mister
Everywhere you look, everywhere you go…there are people talking about Lori Loughlin. After all, the Full House alum has officially begun her two month prison sentence amid the college admissions scandal. While she put on a brave face for her family—a real you've got it dude mentality, if you will—daughters Olivia Jade and Bella Giannulli aren't taking the news so well. "Although the girls knew it was coming and have had time to prepare, it's still devastating to see their mom go," an insider told E! News. "Both Olivia and Bella are very distraught over it." As for the 56-year-old, she's begging fans to have some mercy. As she said back in August at the time of her sentencing, "I am ready to face the consequences and make amends."
The Walking Dead
Ahead of Halloween, Kanye West called upon the dead for a resurrection. Yes, for wife Kim Kardashian's 40th birthday, the "I Am a God" rapper gifted her with a hologram of her late father, Robert Kardashian Sr. "A special surprise from heaven," Kim wrote alongside the video, which featured her dad recounting some of their favorite memories together. "It is so lifelike! We watched it over and over, filled with emotion." Naturally, Kanye also took four five seconds to pat himself on the back, too. After all, he programmed the former lawyer to tell Kim, "You married the most, most, most, most, most genius man in the whole world."
It's Time to Clare the Air
The most explosive moment in Bachelorette history is finally here. In a truly jaw-dropping sneak peek at the Thursday, Nov. 5 episode, we finally hear Chris Harrison say those seven words to Clare Crawley: "Congratulations, you've just blown up The Bachelorette." So what did she do exactly? TBD. But, we see boy band manager Kenny Braasch questioning whether Clare and obvious frontrunner Dale Moss started talking before the show and what we can only assume to be Tayshia Adams exiting a limo. Rest up Bachelor Nation because the journey—and the drama—are just beginning.
Before You Go...
We don't expect you to keep up with every single celebrity Halloween costume. So we did it for you. (You're so very welcome.) Go ahead and keep scrolling for every epic disguise we were blessed to see on TV, Instagram and, gasp, outside.