This Halloween was especially frightening for Jessica Simpson.
In her upcoming memoir Open Book, the superstar reveals how October 31, 2017 made her want to get sober. At 7:30 that morning, she and husband Eric Johnson were on their way to a school assembly for daughter Maxwell Drew, now 7, and, according to an excerpt obtained by People, "I'd already had a drink."
Later in the day, she "zoned out" while her team dressed her up as Willie Nelson, Simpson writes. It was when they asked if she wanted to get her kids—she's mom to Maxi, Ace Knute, 6, and Birdie Mae, 10 months—that the fashion designer realized she wasn't able to. "I was terrified of letting them see me in that shape," Simpson, 39, writes. "I am ashamed to say that I don't know who got them into their costumes that night."
To cope that night, she took an Ambient and fell asleep. "I slept in, afraid to see them, afraid I had failed them," she continues. "I hid until they left, then drank."