Toronto Star Archives/ZUMAPress.com
Hello, friends, I’m your new Soup blogger. My name is Peter. It’s a pretty popular name, and has been used by various saints and powerful rulers of nations like Portugal and Russia—Peter the Great, anyone?—as well as an actual apostle. And a rabbit, and Mr. Pan, the boy who told manhood to go straight to hell. So, not too shabby in the name department, eh?
Anyway, I doubt any of you have ever seen the shoes of Clog Narter, but I have. And let me tell you something, they’re going to be hard to fill. And not just because they’re candy-red, gloss chunk-heel pumps, but they’re not even close to my size. He wears, like, a nine-and-a-half, which is really an uncomfortable fit for me. And they don’t look that great with the Soup Tux-Speedo™ I’m required to wear.
But beyond that, Clog (or Sweet Baby C, as he demanded I refer to him) has left me a formidable challenge—as well as several half-used jars of Nads—in his high standards of hilarity, Internet professionalism and keeping hope alive.
To you, the Soup Blog consumer, I promise this: I shall do my best to live up to the legacy of the Young Vic Tayback (another name he insisted I call him when he wasn’t in the mood for Sweet Baby C), the integrity of The Soup and whatever else it takes to hold onto a job in this s--t economy.