Lost

ABC/MARIO PEREZ

If you haven't already tuned up your TiVo and seen Lost's second episode of the season, "Confirmed Dead," then under no circumstances should you read this. But if you have, strap on your parachute and dive on in! 

WHAT WE LEARNED

Titanic, Meet Oceanic:  Hot damn! There's a plane at the bottom of the ocean, and it's supposed to be no-survivors, 324-passengers-confirmed-dead flight 815! How in the heck is Oceanic going to explain away the Six when they return? And what the heck? Frank was supposed to be the pilot of Oceanic 815? Wow. (P.S. I myself had a little rendezvous with Frank in Hollywood tonight...Stay tuned for more on that in the section below!)

Excessive Anxiety:  When Daniel Faraday was asked why he was so upset by the discovery of the Oceanic 815 wreckage, did you believe his "I don't know?" I didn't. I suspect that he was brokenhearted that Oceanic 815 wasn't where he calculated it would be: the Island.

Where's Madison?  Is it just me, or is the dog playing Vincent not Madison, the pretty girl puppy who used to play Vincent? They better find that real dog before Michael gets back on that island. (Whoops, did I say that out loud?)

Gas Mask, Huh?  Daniel's crew is carrying gas masks, just like the ones Inman (Clancy Brown) used when he dragged Desmond in off the beach. What, exactly, is everyone not supposed to be breathing? The smoke monster? Speaking of which, I LOL'd like you wouldn't believe when Locke held a gun to Ben's head and demanded "What's the monster?" Hee! Finally, someone on the island is as demanding with that question as we have been for three years! If only Ben had answered...Hmph.

What Guy's Map?  Did you hear the ROV operators refer to "the coordinates we pulled of our guys' map"? Any theories as to whom that guy is, and what exactly "sunken trading ship" the coordinates were supposed to pinpoint? And oh yeah, BTW, that was so not the real Oceanic 815. Duh!

Greg Grunberg

Jim Spellman/WireImage.com

Kate, Juliet, Jack, Grunny:  I positively wanted to kiss Kate when she almost pulled the gun out of Daniel's pants, just like she did with Sawyer waaaaay back in the pilot. Also, Juliet and Kate giggling at Jack's "wink thing" was hilarious. And speaking of pilots...Grunny! Awesome to see our boy Greg Grunberg, aka the pilot, again, even if was just in a still photo on a TV. Hopefully he can come back for another cameo in the future. Also, Miles going after Juliet kind of freaked me out, but yay for Jack getting in the way.

Eggs!  If you haven't yet called the Oceanic Airlines 815 Crash Hotline, do it. Do it now: 888-548-0034.

QUOTES OF THE NIGHT

  • "Karl! No, if you're going to sleep with my daughter, I insist you call me Ben."
  • "I don't know, Miles, how stupid are you?" —Jack
  • "Sure, who are we to argue with taller ghost-Walt?!"—Sawyer
  • "Crash? What the hell kind of pilot do you think I am? I put her down safe and sound right over there." —Frank
Spoilers: Spoiler Alert! Sign (White Background)

WHAT LIES AHEAD

  • The previews promised another Oceanic Six reveal next week, but we will also learn about another major main character who's out in the world in the future, who doesn't fall under that banner. Who is that person? The end of this ep pretty much gives it away.
  • Remember the headspace Sayid was in at the beginning of the series, where he was gonna go straight and not torture people anymore and try to play nice with his fellow man? Well, in the future, that's all shot to hell. Emphasis on shot.
  • When I caught up tonight with Jeff Fahey (Frank the kickass "drunk" pilot), he told me fans have accused him of being God, Satan or some dude who's there to impregnate the women on the island. And the clincher? He hinted that one of those is true. What the hey? For more gorey details on that, check back next week for the video, but in the meantime...
  • Crazy Lost Theory of the Week:  Just a totally wild hunch that could be 100 percent wrong...I think the new people have come to the Island to impregnate all the women because only children born on the Island can own or operate the location's priceless time-travel capabilities. Wait, did I just say time travel? Yes, yes, I did. Tee-hee. Now I'm teleporting out of here before anyone catches me...
Post your own theories below! I just know you smarty pants caught some things we didn't! That's what makes this fun, right?
Lost Redux: "Confirmed Dead"
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