Miley Cyrus

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Just about every week, there’s speculation on how Miley Cyrus will transition into adulthood. This week, MSNBC's Scoop decided to go with a promiscuous role in an R-rated movie, where “you’d be seeing a lot more of Cyrus than what appeared in the Vanity Fair photos.” Ooh, naughty!

However, Miles called B.S. on this report in her own lovable way on Ryan Seacrest's KIIS-FM morning show. The actress, who sometimes goes by Hannah Montana, said, “I’m not even allowed to see R-rated movies!” (Check out the full interview here.)

Oh, Miley, so funny. In other words, “Yeah, FALSE!”

Now that we've got that mess settled, let’s talk about Miley’s big release today: Breakout.

She’s been quoted all over the place saying “It’s grown-up.”

It sucks that Miley thinks being grown-up is all about being sad over boys.

A good number of her songs are slow jams fit for that anxious moment at junior high dances where you really want that one boy to ask you for a dance and you’re all like, “Omigod, is he coming over here, oh, wait, no, he’s not. But he totally took a step over in this direction, he’s totally going to ask. The song’s like almost over, what’s going on? I’m prettier than that girl, right? It’s cool, it’s not like I wanted to dance anyway, you know. Where’s my teddy bear?! No one's ever going to love me, I need a good cry.”

We were hoping for more songs for that other junior high moment—where you're at a sleepover on a sugar high and choreographing dance routines while wearing your best friend's old ridiculous dance costumes.

Not all is lost, however: The Jonas Brothers' new album comes out in three weeks.

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