Three weeks ago, Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell welcomed their second child, a daughter named Delta. Just how did the actors settle on that name? "It was a joke because our first daughter's name is Lincoln, which is very masculine," Shepard said on The Ellen DeGeneres Show Thursday. "So, a friend of mine teasingly texted me: 'Oh, great! What's this one gonna be? Navy Seal? Delta Force? Green Beret?'"
"I was reading this text out loud to Kristen. And I said, 'Oh, Louis Steve said what if we named her Delta?' Delta! Delta Bell Sheppard! That's it!'" the 40-year-old Parenthood actor told the TV host. "And that's it!"
Bell gave birth via C-section. "Kristen, god bless her was in labor for 33 hours," Shepard said. "It was incredible." When the Veronica Mars star gave birth to Lincoln, it took 15 hours. "That was child's play."
"This was Fallujah. This was intense," Shepard said, half-jokingly. "And she got an epidural like hour 14, as you should, and I think dads need something. I deserve something because I was along for the ride. It's still a car crash and I'm in the passenger seat. I'm playing Katy Perry and I'm rubbing her back and I'm thinking, 'I need something for this! Help me!' And then at the last minute, which was heartbreaking, she then needed to have a C-section, which happens. It's all right. I have a healthy baby so everything's great. But I had been warned by a lot of different gentlemen and even my own mother said, 'You might not want to watch the baby come out. Maybe not the greatest idea.' What they didn't warn me about was the C-section, which was way worse. So, there's a sheet and then they go, 'The baby's here!' And then you peak around the sheet and they're lifting out the baby, but then you notice your wife is completely disassembled. I can see inside of her. I was like, 'It's a girl! Your liver's out, I think. And then those are definitely your intestines.' And she asks, 'Are you all right!?' 'Oh my God, put her back together correctly!' After seeing this autopsy, I would rather see a school drive out of her vagina. There's nothing worse than seeing your partner flowing over! Guys, I need medication if this happens again."
"It's intense," Shepard said. Bell is a "super healer," he added, "because she never smoked, never drank. Eats perfect. She's like Wolverine! You cut her and as the knife's going through it's sealing. If those kids came out of me I don't know what they'd look like. I'd probably still be in the hospital, probably. Yeah."
"It's a good thing they didn't because it'd be weird," DeGeneres said. "But she's fine. Delta's fine?"
"Everyone is really, really happy," Shepard assured her.
Lincoln is excited to have a sibling. "It's going very well," he said.
Well, it's going mostly well.
"OK, one thing did happen, but this was totally innocent on her part," he confessed. "We're all eating dinner and my mom goes, 'Guys! Guys! Guys!' and we look over and Lincoln has some rocks that she loves and carries around and she's throwing them in the baby's basinet to share. They're big rocks. And the baby is about the size of my thumbnail. There were no injuries, but that got our attention. Just lobbing rocks in. Sharing. Sharing is not caring always. They say it is, but sometimes it's almost murder."