Kendra Wilkinson Baskett says she still doesn't know what will happen between her and husband Hank Baskett III in the wake of reports that he cheated on her with a transsexual woman.
But she is determined to figure out what really did happen. And if it takes forever, so be it.
Even if he is guilty of the ultimate betrayal, "I am still willing to move on and forgive him. I cannot shut this man down," the Kendra On Top star told Giuliana Rancic in an exclusive in-depth interview for next week's special Beyond Candid With Giuliana: Kendra Wilkinson Baskett.
"I'm willing to spend the rest of my life trying to figure this out rather than spend one night single."
A strong statement, which Giuliana delved into further.
"Without Hank in your life?" she asked.
"Without Hank in my life," Kendra added.
But even though Hank is the subject of all the his-actions-led-to-this rumors, the former Girls Next Door star admits that she wasn't there for Hank when he really needed her after his NFL career came to an end.
"The things I do know about Hank, he's had a huge identity crisis," Kendra surmised. "He's played football his whole life. I've only known Hank as a football player and I loved that about him, he was so sexy. And then football ended, here we are, we have a kid and the roles reversed. I became the breadwinner, he became more at home with little Hank, and I think that put a lot of stress onto him."
While she was pregnant with their second child together, Hank would go to her to try to talk about his issues
"And I'd go, ‘Oh get over it, you're a guy, you're a man. Do you see this pregnant ass? Do you see what I'm going through?'" Kendra recalled to Giuliana. "So it was always a competition. There was one night where he literally came to bed shaking 'cause he was going through such anxiety. He was in such a bad place."
Asked if she felt that she ignored Hank's calls for help, Kendra nodded.
"Exactly," she said.
So where are they now, really? She and Hank were actually spotted yesterday in his Jeep, the first time they had been photographed together since the cheating scandal broke three months ago. They continued to film the new season of Kendra on Top, premiering Friday, Oct. 3, at 10/9c on WEtv, throughout the summer amid all the drama.
"He's in a lot of therapy right now," Kendra said, as is she. "We've done some couples therapy. I don't know if him going to therapy means he's guilty. I am willing to forgive him, even if he did it."
Watch the clip to hear more of Kendra's story, including the real deal on the estranged duo's living arrangement and how her own childhood is affecting her experience now.
Meanwhile, don't miss the next installment of Kendra's interview on Monday's E! News at 7/6c & 11/10c, and Beyond Candid With Giuliana: Kendra WIlkinson Baskett premieres Wednesday, Oct. 1, at 8:30/7:30c.