Blind Vice

Dorrell Sausage usually loves getting attention, but this time could be different. See, Dorrell’s a fairly good guy (depending on whom you ask, ‘course). He’s pleasant enough looking, in an old International Male catalog kinda way, that’s fer sure, and, supposedly, Dorrell’s well endowed. But isn’t that comparing biz usually best left to the eye of the benefactor? Regardless, what is Sausage’s claim to fame? We’re not exactly sure.

But let’s see. D.S. is from semifamous lineage, does some boob-tube work now and again and he dabbles in music and design. What fun! But natch, he also loves to date the famous femmes, which is probably why we started talking about him in the first place.

Except that our boy Dorrell has gone and gotten himself in a pickle, as it were—due to his very own pickle, as it further were. Seems Mr. Pee bedded some random, nonfamous babe and didn’t use protection. And he didn’t get (or give) any nasty hickies, but he did go and get the girl knocked up. And guess what? She wants to keep it! D.S. is terrorized in his tidy whities at the paternal prospect. 'Cause if she does, it’ll be the one time Dorrell'll be wishing he didn’t have headlines harkin’ all about him.

And it ain't:
Shia LaBeouf

Jeff Vespa/

Tony Romo

Mike Kline/

John Mayer

Lester Cohen/

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