por Ted Casablanca | Traducido por | jue., 20 dic. 2007 4:33 AM
(Shades of that outrageous notion that Britney herself was a virgin—while hotel-room hopping with Justin in the middle of the night—come to mind, can't think why.)
Fame Pictures Inc.
And now Sean Preston and Jayden James can play with Jamie's tyke! And if Brit's boys do get legally limited (as it seems to be sadly headed that way, with Brit blowing off court date after court date), she can borrow Jamie Lynn's little one for a few hours.
Hey, Lynne Spears, what do you have to say about all this? You gonna tell us all of your fab parenting tips in that book you're penning for a Christian publishing company? We're all ears...
(We can hear Kathy Hilton laughing her womanly ass off in Bel-Air right now.)
AP Photo/Matt Sayles
"Well, Lauren's people talked to the limo company," he told Cristina G, adding that the snowy limo previously sent was too flashy for Lauren's humble tastes. "She didn't want something too over-the-top."
She ended up arriving in a very simple, Town Car-eqsue chariot instead. And it just so happened to be très chic black. Knew it!
Then the same industrious Conrad bum-smoocher rings up yours truly with a rather different story. "Lauren was running late from the airport, so we cancelled the limo," he sacrificially offered, before again saying how very sweet Lauren-poo was.
Now, listen, bitches. We're not saying this whole sucky sitch is all Lauren's doing. It appears as her reps are at least partially to blame for being overly demanding (claims the limo company we originally heard from) and giving her client a pushy, high maintenance rep. Either that, or maybe Heidi's got something to really beef about, after all?
And while Lauren-love (or her people) are jeopardizing that nice-girl rep with diva demands, Ms. C's Hills costars (and archenemies) Heidi M and Spencer Pratt are working overtime at polishing their halos. And yes, they're still together.
We know, we know, the finale tried to make it seem like the overly blond duo's splitting up—and Heidi arrived at the after-party without her ring—but trust us, this gruesome twosome is still very much on. Besides, do you actually think they'd want it any other way than us panting over their relationship's status? 'Course not. That would be like saying Lauren-love doesn't have anything against white stretch BMWs.
Case in point on the togetherness of H 'n' S: Both booby types are scheduled to hit Hell-Ay's skid row bright and early Monday morning (aka Christmas Eve). In addition to doling out food for the homeless, they'll also give out toys and gifts to less fortunate kids—the very action Lauren-hon affected when she ditched her toy-filled white limo in Chi-town.
Also pitching in for this par-tick charity event are Melissa Joan Hart and Jennifer Love Hewitt (bet she'll stay away from the carbs). Speidi also helped served T-Day dinner at the L.A. Mission back in November, for the saintly record.
Now, we know they're probably in it for the photo ops, but Heidi and her man sure are looking good compared to Lauren lately.
AP Photo/Eugene Hoshiko
Even Nicole got wind of the save-your-ass memo, just like Heidi and Spence. While Lauren's choosing cars over charity and Paris is opting for swapping spit with recycled Lohan exes, Heidi and Spence do underprivileged downtown. Just as Nic and her man, Joel Madden, not only helped feed the homeless here for Thanksgiving, they also gave hundreds of thousands of dollars to expectant mothers in need.
Lauren and Paris, you two so need to catch up.
Congrats to Lance! This column hasn't been exactly kissy-kissy about his past acshuns with the babes (split from the first wife-unit; hookup, breakup, rehookup, rebreakup with Sheryl Crow; then Ashley). But L.A. raises oodles for cancer patients, and now this show of support for the guys 'n' gals away from home during the holidays. It's all fab.
Sorta sounds like a dude who might one day run for office, doesn't it? American hero-cum-celeb-heartbreaker-cum-charitable-cheerleader! Which is it gonna be, Mr. A, governor or Prez? Neither, according to his spokespeople, who claim Armstrong's not running for anything—right now. But mark my goss-blackened soul, as well as a few other pissy pundits round the country, Lance is running for something...soon.
Can't wait to ask the man (should he run, 'course) a hotbed inquiry or two, you? Same-sex marriage? Abortion? Stem-cell, Texas annexation...jeez, it's gonna be as if that Olsen gal never existed.
(Which might be exactly what he'd like.)
E! Networks/Comcast Entertainment Group
He said he was going to show her a VIP room, she snit-relayed to us, but Louie really took her back into a kitchen and locked the door. When the young honey refused to do anything with the sleazy dude, he proceeded to take matters into his own hands. Yup, to her absolute horror, he proceeded to wank off right in front of the shocked femme.
Thought that only happened in studio execs' offices these days. Apparently not. Why more women don't believe in a little castration now and then is beyond me.
Why's that? Because according to these mutual amigos we share, both Reese and Jake have been trying personal sitches that, uh, pull them away from each other a lot. Wonder what sitches those could possibly be? No matter. Both cuties are darling. Hope they find mucho happiness in '08.
Just ain't gonna be with each other.
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