Jennifer Aniston, George Clooney

Carlos Alvarez/Getty Images; Jeff Vespa/WireImage

Dear Ted:
George Clooney
and Jennifer Aniston seem like a match made in heaven. Both like drinking and holidaying and don't seem interested in having kids. Pretty much two peas in a pod. In my opinion, both should ditch their partners of the moment (who they picked up prior to their latest film premiere) and just hook up already. Thoughts?

Dear Smoking What Jen Smokes:
Sorry, babe, but we are so not onboard here. You don't get it, do you? Both Jen and George thrive on being the more famous one, regardless of whom they're dating. That's rule No. 1. The partying companionship stuff comes later, much.

Dear Ted:
What's with all the gossip on the comment boards about Robert Pattinson and Jennifer Lawrence? That they hooked before he jetted over to see Kristen Stewart for the "showmance!" Please tell me they are not true.

Dear Bothered Bingo:
Yep. And please tell me you don't buy it. Come on, R.Pattz only has eyes for K.Stew, at least when it comes to female company, babe! (Partying full steam with the boys is another set of rumors, much less easy to get away from...)

Dear Ted:
What do you think about a Desperate Housewives movie?

Dear Weary-isteria Lane:
I like it about as much as Sex and the City II's trip to Abu Dhabi.  Please, ABC execs and Marc Cherry, spare us all this needless pain and kill the whole mess now and forever.

Dear Ted:
Is Corey Monteith standing up for his Glee castmates? I'm hearing he complained that the cast is overworked and underpaid.

Dear Out Foxed:
Enough with the Glee goss! The show is so in danger of getting oversaturated with too much buzz, can we all just stop and enjoy the music for a sec?

Dear Ted:
Please tell me the rumors aren't true about Jennifer Lopez and Bradley Cooper hooking up?

Dear You Got It:
Just conjure up thoughts of how different an animal Jennifer Lopez is from Renée Zellweger, if you're having any trouble disbelieving this one.

Dear Ted:
I am brokenhearted after watching the True Blood season finale last night. Not that it wasn't totally fab, because it was, but because I have to wait way too long before I can get another Sookie-Bill fix! Please, I implore you to give me some details on the nature of Anna Paquin's Blind Vice.

Dear Absolutely Not:
I'm sorry, I am in such a foul mood after that heartbreaking finale, I cannot even begin to muster writing about anything to do with Sookie, who should have been with her Bill—offscreen. Nothing else matters right now.

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