Obviously, it's not easy reaching the lofty standards of the legendary Dallas Cowboy cheerleading squad. If it was, there wouldn't be a show about it. A show filled with drama, tension, heartbreak and a glimpse at just how foolish some cheerleading hopefuls can be. The lesson here? Being beautiful just isn't enough, apparently.  You've gotta thin it to win it.

I'm just too fat, so I'll be surgically removing pretty much anything beneath my skin that isn't super important. So, like, I'll need to keep the bones, but I guess that's about it. I'm not going to blow this again.

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