The-Dream Considered Suicide After "Failed" Marriage to Christina Milian

Producer says he considered taking his own life in wake of split from singer, takes "full responsibility" for the break

There's no denying that The-Dream has taken a bit of a bruising in the press this week.

Though getting your photograph taken while being straddled by a bikini-clad woman who's not your wife, followed by a less than punctual announcement that you've separated from the mother of your newborn child will almost guarantee you a smattering of negative publicity.

So Christina Milian's estranged hubby has taken to his blog to tell his side of the story. And it's a pretty dramatic account.

First up: denying that any other woman, let alone the one he was caught frolicking with, was involved in the demise of his marriage.

"I would love to tell the truth as to why my relationship wasn't successful, but today that is between me and Christina," he writes. "Its easy to say that it's because of another woman or a new relationship, but truthfully, IT'S NOT."

In fact, The-Dream places the blame for the split squarely on his own shoulders.

" I take FULL RESPONSIBILITY for misleading everyone into thinking everything was fine and okay when we knew problems existed for awhile!...I am Human and people fall in and out of Love all the time…My faults are that I can be irresponsible and an ass sometimes, but I HAVE NEVER and WILL NEVER be a malicious person or wish harm to anyone, especially those I love or the mother of my child."

He goes on to apologize for his actions and shoulder the responsibility of the breakup.

"I'm sorry for the embarrassment to everyone involved! If there's anyone to blame and you can't fathom this happening, please blame me and me alone for not being upfront! Even though we were trying to overcome personal things between us, I was just simply scared and embarrassed to let everyone know we WERE FAILING and HAVE NOW FAILED!"

The-Dream also reveals that the separation caused him so much distress that at one point he even considered suicide.

"This is not to justify anything, it's true emotion! It's a real thing that involves real people! I've cried about this for months, after interviews, after prayer and I've tried to take my own life at a point because of the failure that was looming."

Fortunately, it did not come to that. But The-Dream continues to seriously hurt from the split.

"I wanted to speak up but we decided it wasn't for anyone to know…There was so much going on in me and Christina's personal world that I tried to deal with it as delicately as I could and tried to regain my footing. Instead of being direct in order not to cause even more hurt or hurt someone's feelings, I carried the weight in secret."

Luckily, he regained some hope for the future thanks to the other (not like that) woman in his life.

"I was reminded by my MOTHER that I am not 'Superman' and its okay to lose sometimes…This too shall pass! And everything will be fine!"

(Originally published July 16, 2010, at 12:40 p.m. PT)