Dear Ted:
Just wondering, have you seen Alexander Skarsgård's "going wild" video? Do Europeans really do that once they're drunk? Or is it just Alex? And after the video surfaced, he and Kate came out shopping together. Some pals said this is some kind of PR damage control. What do you think? Should we expect more "shopping trips" from them?

Dear BAC-helor:
Babe, don't think that kind of booze-induced behavior is strictly limited to the Euro crowd. Some dudes are just more...affectionate than others. It's especially not that peculiar within T-town, rest assured. As for shopping sprees with the GF, same old crap as always. Expect plenty more trips out on the town. Totally groan-worthy, no?

Dear Ted:
Is Morgan Mayhem friends with any other B.V. babes?

Dear Frenemies:
I wouldn't exactly say Morgs is supertight with anyone—except maybe Misha Mayhem. And that's part of M2's problem: No one is honest with the messed up megastar, so she never thinks she does a damn thing wrong.

Dear Ted:
Is Ashley Greene the new playgirl? There were rumored flings last year with Chace Crawford and Jared Followill, and then the make-out pictures with Brock Kelly surface just weeks ago, followed shortly by a dozen dating rumors involving Joe Jonas after a visit to the U.K. She's got these hot guys just lining up. Any dirt for us?
—Greene with Envy

Dear Greener Pastures:
Some of the dudes she's linked to are dud rumors, but she's young and so damn sexy, why shouldn't Ash be testing the waters? She's not in a relaysh or married. Let the girl play for Twilight's sake!

Dear Ted:
I just read Furious Love, the story of Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton's marriage. You could say they were the Robsten of the '60s except the media attention was 100 times worse. I can't believe people actually went through all this. Miss Taylor actually seems like a very nice and caring lady. Have you ever met her in person and does she seem this way to you? I will love her forever because of the money she raised for AIDS research. My son was HIV infected and because of the medicine that was available to him, he was able to live a productive life for a long time. He died of a massive heart attack several years ago and I would just like to say god bless Elizabeth Taylor and keep up the good work!

Dear Sunnie Also Rises:
So sorry about the loss of your son, please accept my deepest condolences. Yes, Taylor's always been a trailblazer, and yes, I've met and interviewed her a few times. She's incredibly raucous, yet gracious. And I'm right in the middle of Furious—cannot believe the amount of booze those two put away! Who did Taylor and Burton think they were, a couple of Lindsay Lohans?

Dear Ted:
Many thanks for yesterday's update (albeit disappointing) on my two favorite Blind Vicers, Toothy Tile and Grey Goose. I was starting to think you had thrown in the towel on these two. With the news that G.G. is now the least likely to step out of the closet, does this mean G.G. might actually genuinely be falling for his beard? As sad as it may be, is this the end of Toothy and Goose's erratic relationship?

Dear Heart of the Matter:
More like G2 is genuinely falling for his booming career—his beard is just helping him get there.

Dear Ted:
I just can't help but wonder, is Scarlett Johansson Polly Luscious-Locks? She's an indie chick and had problems on the set with Gwyneth Paltrow in Iron Man 2. After yesterday's news about Ed Norton being replaced as the Hulk, my ears perked up, and I wasn't buying what the studio was selling!

Dear Mean Money:
Nice detective work, El, but ScarJo isn't our money-hungry minx. Ed's departure from The Avengers is way more public than the action going on with Polly—and the studio wants to keep it that way.

Dear Ted:
I'm curious about Robert Pattinson and the Harry Potter cast. Did they get along? You don't hear much Potter gossip so I was just wondering.

Dear Those Diggory Days:
I'm thinking yes. You remember that Rob, back then, wasn't the Rob he is now, so if they didn't get along, it certainly wasn't because of star power or anything of that sort, but personality differences (like with all normal people). But since we know how laid back and likable Rob is on every set he visits, Goblet of Fire was certainly no different!

Dear Ted:
I want to know if Will Smith and Jennifer Aniston ever had Blind Vices? They seem like the last people to have one, which is why I'm thinking we are onto something!

Dear Sugar Pie:
Yes for Will, no for darling Jen. Yeah, shocker, right?

Dear Ted:
In light of everything that has happened, how can Jodie Foster possibly be friends with Mel Gibson? I couldn't believe she defended him during the entire "sugar tits" drama. Given her public persona and his psychotic rampages, it just doesn't make any sense to me! I can't believe this woman would be friends with someone like that!
—Sweet Subversion

Dear Foster Friend:
Folks have their opinions and are entitled to them. And while I think she's hurting herself by sticking up for him, you have to admire her loyalty. Well, I lied—you don't have to. I don't.

Dear Ted:
What the heck has happened to the career of Winona Ryder? She went from Girl, Interrupted to girl without a job. Did her shoplifting arrest cause her career to go kaput or was it something else?
—Peppermint Patty

Dear Taryn > Winona:
Yeah, Winona's not exactly making a comeback. Her last memorable role was falling off a cliff in Star Trek. Not quite A-list material. I'm thinking it was a combination of the shoplifting thing and the fact that, quite frankly, nobody ever really counted Winona Ryder as their favorite actress anyway.

Dear Ted:
How's a girl supposed to know who is bi, gay or otherwise when it seems like even the ones long suspected of same-sex shenanigans are shacking up and having babies? One of your old timer Blind Vices just announced a baby on the way and I was sure he was gay and used to be with a famous beard. I mean at this point I wouldn't be surprised if Grey Goose and his beard announced a marriage and a kid on the way, and now you're saying the oh-so-gay Parrish Maguire (nice name by the way) is doubting his gayness! Please! Seriously!

Dear Miss Mariss:
That's the problem with assumptions about my Vices—you never quite really know who they are, do ya? And unless they out themselves, that Hollywood-encompassing Venn diagram of gay and nay isn't gonna happen. To quote the greatest pop star of our time (Adam Lambert), Whaddya want from me!?

Dear Ted:
We all know how superclose Jackles are, but I'm wondering are Jared Padalecki and Danneel Harris friends? And how about Jensen Ackles and Genevieve Cortese, friends or no?

Dear Chummy Chums:
Friendly enough.

Dear Ted:
You are always talking about the naughty things that stars are up to, and I love it, but can you give me any idea on which stars are as nice and "not naughty" (at least by Hollywood standards) as they appear? I don't have any rescue animals to sway you (unless you count the retired K-9 police dog in my backyard) but I do donate to the ASPCA and the Humane Society.
—A from Portland

Dear Portland Puss:
Wrong columnist to ask, sorry. Try one of those butt-kissing ones...There are so many.

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