Has Nicole Richie actually managed to vanish from the prying glare of the paparazzi these days? We're counting down T minus seven days since Nic's been photographed with the likes of anyone, including gal-pal Lindsay Lohan, who's still on lockdown in Wonderland. Or Paris Hilton, who's busy workin' on that Oscar nom. We may have some ideas...
Nicole Richie

Mike Guastella/WireImage.com

Hmmm…it's been a busy week in the rags, what with Lindsay in rehab, Paris copping a DUI plea and Brit tearin' up the town with her man, Isaac Cohen. But has anyone else noticed there's been no recent slobbering coverage on America's fave princess, Nicole Richie?

Thought I was getting sick of seeing H-town's skinniest celebutante in every tabloid, but now I'm just plain worried. You? Haven't even seen or heard anything on hot-to-trot Nic since last Wednesday, quelle horreur!

Joel Madden

Nancy Kaszerman/ZUMApress.com

Apparently, Nicole's also been absent from her and Paris' private acting classes, as of late. Some sources speculate Nic-babe is in Bangkok with boy-toy Joel Madden, whose band, Good Charlotte, is performing at the Asia Aid concert. Pap footage popped up on the 19th of Nic at LAX. But the GC show ain't scheduled until Feb. 3. Doesn't Jan. 19 seem a li'l early for a busy gal like Nicole to skip town?

Hmmm. I know you're all on the edge of your size-subzero derrieres with this one, too. But look, two weeks is a long vacay for Hollywood It girls to be off the photographic radar, doncha think?

So, Nic, while Paris is busy perfecting her acting skills, you're off honing your globe-trotting abilities? Paris just might beat you to that Oscar, after all.

Unless Nic's really doing something completely different in her downtime and trying to keep us all in the dark. Could that be at all possible?

I daresay it could. Look for more soon on this developing, vital sitch. Till then, sate yourself with these de-lish drippings of reader rantings…

 

Isaiah Washington

Michael Caulfield/WireImage.com

Dear Ted:
You ruined the night of the talented actors on Grey's Anatomy and ruined watching their press coverage for me. I love this show, and they deserved to win and be recognized for their acting talents. All of them. If you have a problem with Isaiah Washington, take it up with him another time instead of messing up the rest of the cast's time to shine. I'll no longer read your column, and that I am sorry for.
  Stephanie
  Baton Rouge, Louisiana

Dear Missing It:
Darling, I appreciate your sense of decorum, but it's hugely outweighing your sense of right and wrong. No further comment from moi.
Britney Spears, Sean Preston

Jamie McCarthy/WireImage.com

Dear Ted:
So, the latest pictures of Britney Spears are starting to resemble the always unattractive Brandon Davis...Seems like everyone who comes in contact with Paris turns into a puffy head!
  Sarah
  Bay City, Michigan

Dear Puff 'n' Stuff:
And it seems this peculiar fever may be catching on! Former gal-pal to Paris Lindsay Lohan is the latest amiga to suffer to-the-hilt Hilton's hangover effect. Let's just hope Paris' new BFF, Vanessa Minnillo, doesn't do the same. I'm sure Nick would hate to see that pretty face turn all bloated.

Grey's Anatomy, Shonda Rhimes

Daniel George/ZUMApress.com

Dear Ted:
I have to tell you how proud I am that you are not going to let this Grey's Anatomy thing slide. Isaiah Washington should be fired. If he had used a racial or even a religious slur, he most certainly would have been. Shonda Rhimes should be ashamed of herself for going along with him.
  Andrea
  Seattle

Dear Rhimes with Revenge:
I wouldn't be so certain 'bout that last statement of yours. Stay tuned.

Kelly Ripa

Dimitrios Kambouris/WireImage.com

Dear Ted:
I've read your column for years, but I will never read it again. I don't care that you defend Rosie O'Donnell—that's your choice. But to continue to perpetuate the ridiculous theory that Kelly Ripa is homophobic is not only mean, it's ignorant. Nobody gives a s--t if you, Rosie, Clay or anyone else is gay. Get over yourselves.
  Lisa
  New York City

Dear Ripa United:
Whose side are you on here? You seem a tad confused yourself. Pick a side, and stick to it.

Ted Casablanca

E! Networks

Dear Ted:
Are you gay?
  John
  New York City

Dear Broken Schmo-dar:
Well, darling, let's just say you never know where my digits have been.
 

Britney Spears

James Devaney/WireImage.com

Dear Ted:
I've figured you out again! I'm telling you, I need to be on payroll...Sniffer Stella from Two Schnoz-Straining Blind Vices is Britney Spears! There was a little "slip" in the column with the initials. It started off as S.S. and ended up as S.B. (and we all know that S and B are nowhere near each other on the keyboard, Teddy!).
  D.I.

Dear Super Snooper:
Wow, impressive attention to detail, but S2 ain't Brit-Brit. 'Twas a typo, dear.

T.R. Knight

Lisa O'Connor/ZUMApress.com

Dear Ted:
Ted the Fabulous, I have been reading with interest all the coverage of the Isaiah Washington foolishness. That man should be ashamed of himself! (Mind you, I was offended, and I'm a hetero gal from Boston!) My question is this: What do you think would be going on if T.R. Knight dropped the N-word on Isaiah? My guess is it would have lit a few more candles under some people's asses.
  Dawn
  Boston

Dear Obvious:
More like a bonfire, like the one that burned Michael Richards' hide—as it should be."

Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie

Steve Granitz/WireImage.com

Dear Ted:
At the Golden Globes, do you think Angelina Jolie's displays of affection toward Brad were genuine? I say yes. My sister says she doesn't buy it.
  Ana Maria
  Reynosa, Mexico

Dear Twisted Sisters:
Angie was indeed cold as ice during the pre-G interviews, and she led poor Brad round the red carpet like her little Pomeranian! Whether this 'tude was for show or not remains a mystery to me. I still say Brad's more into her than she is into him.
Angelina Jolie

Gregg DeGuire/WireImage.com

Dear Ted:
Do you (oh, great guru of gossip) think the reason why most people are always on Angelina Jolie's case is because of her exotic, unique and uncommon beauty, or her ability to "steal" happily married men from their wives? Or could it be because she does humanitarian work around the world? I cannot understand the constant negativity toward her. She is so unscandalous and downright boring right now. Why the continued media frenzy?
  Dow
  New York City

Dear Dowie Downer:
It's like a very simple math equation. Gals hate Angie 'cause they fear the loss of their boyfriends/husbands in her presence. Men are just excited that a woman this hot actually exists. So, ultimately, the humanitarian thing doesn't really matter! The media is just obsessed with Brangelina because they are the tastiest thang to hit town since the chalupa.

Ellen DeGeneres

Glenn Weiner/ZUMA Press

Dear Ted:
Thanks for a few nice lines about Ellen. We SoFLA gals are tired of the antics of Paris and Nicole. Ellen deserves more print than she gets, and it's great to read she's doing well both professionally and personally.
  Shane
  Hollywood, Florida

Dear Shaneanigans:
Until Ellen does something crazy, weird or illegal, she'll continue to get minimal "nice" tidbits here on the AT. Just remember: It isn't called the Awful Truth for nothing—so I will show my talons when need be, even if we have to use them on little Ellie.
Rosie O'Donnell, Donald Trump

Jeffrey Mayer/WireImage.com, Nancy Kaszerman/ZUMApress.com

Dear Ted:
Please lay off religious right Republicans. I am one, but I still faithfully read your column every day and have several gay friends. We're not all bad. And for the Rosie-Donald thing, I think they both should grow up and start acting like adults. This back-and-forth has gotten way over the top.
  Angela
  Greensboro, North Carolina

Dear Elephant Brain:
No to everything you wrote, crumbcake, but thanks for the shout-out!

Dear Ted:
Okay, Ted. You've been back for a while and promised to put more color in your column, but I haven't seen any. It's still just as white as the snow that ain't falling this year in Jersey! Broaden your gossip horizons or lose me as a reader forever. (I know that's just such a scary thought!) Step up, man!
  Kacy
  Morris County, New Jersey

Dear Bitchy:
If that little catfight I started at the Globes doesn't do it for ya, doll, nothing will. Miss ya already.

Jamie Foxx

Lisa O'Connor/ZUMA Press

Dear Ted:
Love your column. I'm guessing Toothy Tile is Jamie Foxx. Am I close?
  Jlynn
  New Albany, Ohio

Dear Ice-Old:
You guessed wrong, my friend. So off. Think younger, nicer and less awarded.
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