Beyonce Knowles

Lisa O'Connor/ZUMAPress.com

The Hollywood community has been shaken to its very foundation today by a groundbreaking new tactic to determine the viability of celebrities and their careers. Show-business news website Starpulse.com has created a posting entitled Beyoncé Knowles —Hot or Not?, allowing viewers to judge Knowles’ standing in the cutthroat world of entertainment.

“This is shocking to say the least,” stated a Hollywood source to Soup Blog reporters. “If these people with computers out there, whoever they are, decide Beyoncé is not hot, the woman’s entire career could go straight to hell. And who's next on the block? The Jonas Brothers? Miley Cyrus? Cloris Leachman? This kind of vigilante justice is terrifying and must be stopped before normal people take complete control of Hollywood.”

At press time, the all-important poll had received four comments, ranging from “sometimes hot”  to “most definitely smoking hot” to “hot,” indicating that Knowles’ career as one of the top female recording artists may be able to survive.

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