Janet Jackson

AP Photo/Shizuo Kambayashi

Shall we call Janet Miss Jackson since we're about to get nasty on J2's case?

Our fave Jackson family member (tho there ain't much to choose from) is now up to six cancelled concerts in just one week's time, but that number will probably climb by tomorrow, right? Babe's suffering from some mysterious illness that her people ain't opening up about, how odd. Or not. Can't be as simple as a sore throat, otherwise they woulda said as such, no? Could it be pregnancy?

Jan's fluctuating figure has been on the heavier end recently—we ain't bashin' her full fig, just observing. It's all of J's jealous ninnies in the Biz who are pulling the curvy cutting comments, not us. But even if she was carrying a li'l Jermaine Dupri, wouldn't her fans forgive her pronto? Gwen Stefani, Jennifer Lopez and Christina Aguilera were able to go on with their own shows despite being pregged up. And we can bet Jack-hon could kick all of their asses, with child or not.

So what the ef's going on, J?

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