Kendall Jenner is one of the most photographed women in the world, but some days, she just wants to disappear. Cara Delevingne interviewed the supermodel for the February issue of Harper's Bazaar, on newsstands Jan. 23, where she spoke candidly about the downside of fame.
"I feel like the life I live is extraordinary in a lot of ways but that it also comes with a lot of responsibilities," she said. "I've had to grow up pretty fast and deal with situations most 22-year-olds aren't really put into. There are days and weeks and months when you just don't stop." As a jet-setting star herself, Delevingne gets it, admitting the pressure can be "crushing."
"It can!" the Keeping Up With the Kardashians star agreed. "And you know me and how OCD I can get over the littlest things. If something isn't going the way I planned, I freak out. Some days I just want to go live on a farm and not talk to anyone and just exist in the middle of nowhere."
Lately, Jenner said she has been suffering from "debilitating anxiety."
"I literally wake up in the middle of the night with full-on panic attacks. Where do I even start? Everything is so horrible; it's hard to name one thing. I just think that the world needs so much love. I wish I had the power to send Cupid around the planet, as cheesy as that sounds," the supermodel told Delevingne. "You go online and you see everyone saying the worst things to each other, and it's hard to stay positive. It's hard not to get eaten alive by all the negativity."
For her own sanity, Jenner—who has 86.2 million Instagram followers—said she's "tried to stay off" the social media platform lately. "I definitely don't look at comments. I think Instagram is still a fun place for the most part. I like going on and seeing what people are up to, but I mostly follow stupid accounts with pictures of puppies and little baby animals and people saving animals," she said. "Forget about Twitter, which is so not fun these days. It just makes me sad."
Jenner has been in the spotlight for over a decade, but she doesn't always see herself as a celebrity. "I had a pretty normal childhood, with a twist, and went to school until the 10th grade. For 11th and 12th, I did home school, but I still saw a lot of my old friends," she said. "I didn't go to prom, though, which was kind of annoying. I can't really complain except for now, maybe, I would like to go to Disneyland or a public beach. To go to a beach in peace would be lovely. To be able to hang out and meet new people and not be bothered would be awesome."
Read the full interview with Jenner at Harper's Bazaar.