Caught! Fierce Femmes Take Florida

Chelsea Handler and Sandra Bernhard party in the city where the heat is on

Funny ladies Chelsea Handler and Sandra Bernhard performed in Florida this weekend, and both caused quite the stir. Yeah, such the surprise.

The sassy comediennes definitely shocked their game audience members, and while both ladies put on hilarious shows, one may want to credit some particularly boozy jokes on the a-a-a-lcohol…

Handler, resident E! laugh queen and cheeky author of Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea performed at the Fillmore on South Beach and girlfriend was feelin' it. "She looked fierce in high heels and tight jeans, but sounded like she'd had a few," our source said.

Well, that right-on bitch does with booze what we do with juice, so what the hell do you expect, right?

Chels certainly has made her fondness for cocktails well-known, so come on already. But not even one too many martinis could stop her from going out with a bang. "She was really funny and it was great to hear her curse up a storm!" added our sandy source. Potty mouth and laughs, too? Who can lose with that combo?  

Perhaps slightly less out there, but just as adrenaline-driven, was fabulous funny lady (and former Madonna BFF)…

Sandra Bernhard, who fought back when one audience member heckled her during her show at the Parker Playhouse in Fort Lauderdale, and she ripped into the loudmouth!

When the heckler yelled "BORING!" in the middle of one of her stories, Sandra, according to our source, "let him have it, flipping him the bird and telling him to f--k off." When another audience member commended her on her tirade, randy Sandy said, "Oh, honey, I went! Any more and I'll have to come down there and take a s--t on his head!" 'Atta girl!

Remind us to never to make a loud comment at a comedy show again. Also partying with appeal in Miami were…

Serena Williams, Kim Kardashian and LaLa Vasquez, who showed up to support Kelly Rowland's launch party for her new girl-empowering initiative, I Heart My Girlfriends, at One Bal Harbour. Our Miami eyes said Kim looked absolutely scintillating in a tight red dress—sending a message to a certain ex-BF perhaps? Go get 'em, honey.

And although we miss the days of Destiny's Child, we were excited to learn that Kelly is planning on touring this summer, and she recently debuted her new David Guetta-produced single "Commander." Summer jam, anyone?

While Kim and Kelly may have been basking in the Miami rays all royal-like, more down-home and fuzzy was…

Harrison Ford, who made two gay fans very happy recently in Jackson Hole, Wyo. The two guys noticed Harr, clad in sexy jeans and a parka, as he bought a lift ticket for a kid. Harrison was superfriendly to the dudes, but he wouldn't oblige them with a photo, saying that if he did it for them, he'd "have to do it for everyone else." But our sources say he was superpolite about the whole thing, which made them still terribly happy.

Wow, that must have been one helluva no.

—With additional reporting by Kate Alper