Jennifer Garner, Ben Affleck

Why do I always have to be the bitch around here? Yes, it's fabulous, just too, too, that Ben 'n' Jen are expecting their second kid.

But, have you caught the overly secretive way in which they've been hiding it? And when they finally did fess up that they were preggers, they really did sound like they were announcing a very lovely addition to their tasteful house—not their family.

It's all just rather tepid and understated, even for Garner (who usually reserves her more heated emotions for dumping men behind their backs). But, so insist my Garner insiders, a lasting marriage with J.Lo's ex is the last thing on the Alias hon's mind.

"She's still got her lawyer's number," said one of the more reliable, albeit nastier members of the Jen 'n' Ben entourage I speak with. "That number's not goin' anywhere."

This, mind you, even though Jen and Ben's reppers seethingly (his) and stoically (hers) still say nada's wrong with the marriage. Not true, mark my goss words. This unpleasant affair's just been put on crib hold.

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