Riverdale Finally Gets Some Much Needed Therapy

Riverdale finally had the main kids sit down with a psychologist and boy did they need it, but we also got a new flashforward to Jughead's alleged murder

By Lauren Piester 05 Dec, 2019 2:00 AMTags
Riverdale, Season 4The CW

Frickin' finally, Riverdale

We've been calling for all of the characters of Riverdale to get some therapy since season one, and tonight's episode sat its main characters down with a licensed psychologist named Ms. Burble and played by Gina Torres and worked through their many, many, many issues. And after sitting through that hour of fictional characters in therapy, we now feel like we've been through some therapy.

We feel calmer, happier, more at peace knowing that the kids of Riverdale know just how messed up they are, even if we're also wondering where the hell Ms. Burble has been for four seasons of serial killers and all-school games of deathly G&G. She may have taken her sweet time showing up, but she's here, and boy are we happy to see her. 

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Riverdale Adds New Layers To Its Boarding School Mystery

First up was Betty and Alice, who were furious at each other after Alice snooped in Betty's room and found her birth control. She also opened Betty's mail and found she had been rejected "from college" (it was just one college), assuming it was because Betty had been too busy having sex instead of studying. 

We would like to argue that Betty has been busy tracking down her serial killer father and solving mysteries and dealing with her mother's involvement in a goddamn cult and college had to be pretty far down on her list of priorities, but whatever. Betty did point out that those things were all reasons her mother had no business snooping, and Ms. Burble pointed out that maybe Alice is desperately trying to keep Betty from growing up, which is probably correct. 

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In Archie's session, Ms. Burble pointed out that it's not the best idea to try to act out superhero fantasies, and that the best thing Archie can do is just continue to try to make the community center better. What a good idea, Ms. Burble! 

So Archie decided to move out of his house, move into the community center, and set up a hotline for people who felt they were in danger. And by the end of the ep, a kid was asking for help with a man who was hurting his mother, and Archie had grabbed a mask and headed out the door. So therapy did not help Archie, but is anyone surprised by this? We're not! 

Watch: "Riverdale" Star Madelaine Petsch Inspires This Makeover!

Veronica then discovered she was admitted early to Harvard, but it was clearly only because her father had rigged it. This sent her to Ms. Burble, who helped her realize she had to get out from under her father's thumb. So she decided to go to Yale instead (did she apply to Yale? unclear!) and also compete against her father in making rum. She isn't even old enough to legally drink rum, but whatever, it's fine! That's irrelevant in the land of Riverdale. 

Cheryl also sat down with Ms. Burble, who took the information of Cheryl's convos with her brother's corpse and the fact that she's being haunted by a doll possessed by the dead twin she absorbed remarkably well. She basically said ghosts aren't real, and you can take a test to find out if you absorbed a twin in the womb. Cheryl took the test, and she absorbed no twins, which means someone's just messing with her! 

But Ms. Burble also determined that Cheryl's not mentally fit to lead the Vixens on her own anymore (which we could have told you ourselves), and she needs some adult supervision.  

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And then there's Jughead, who needed transcripts from Riverdale to apply to colleges, which put him in Ms. Burble's office. She pointed out that his desperate attempts to prove his grandfather was better than a mean drunk were hurting his dad, and he really should just calm down and do his homework.

This did get Jughead to go give his dad a hug and tell him he loved him, but it did not prevent him from continuing to investigate mysteries at Stonewall Prep. He discovered that almost all of the members of the original Quill & Skull society are mysteriously dead, and Betty was wisely like, hey, you should not go to this school anymore. 

But no, Jughead has to stay at Stonewall to solve this new mystery instead of doing his homework, which is probably how he gets himself allegedly murdered in those flashforwards that might also still be fake

Tonight's flashforward had Betty, Archie, and Veronica in a line-up, with Jughead's seminar classmates confirming to FP that yes, it was those kids they saw murder Jughead. It's just the latest addition to Riverdale's attempts to convince us Jughead will be murdered in the spring, the rest of which you can see below!

Season 3 Finale: Spring Break Senior Year (Flash Forward)

We see Betty, Archie, and Veronica in their underwear standing around a fire. Betty says this: "We have to burn all of our clothes, including Jughead's beanie. We'll wash off the blood in the swimming hole. After tonight, we never speak of this, ever. Not to each other, not to our parents. No one. We finish our senior year, we graduate, and we'll go our separate ways. That is the only way that we won't get caught." 

Archie throws Jughead's hat in the fire. 

Season 4, Episode 2: Spring Break (Flash Forward)

We see FP leading a search party in the woods in the rain, including Betty, Kevin, Archie, and Veronica, and they're all yelling for Jughead. 

Season 4, Episode 3: Stonewall Prep

Jughead starts at a new boarding school, Stonewall Prep, where his grandfather went for a few months. He's living with familiar roommate Moose and unfamiliar and unfriendly roommate Bret. Bret and Jughead quickly became enemies, and we quickly saw that Bret has a thing for family legacies. Instead of going after Jughead, Bret started tormenting Moose. 

Season 4, Episode 4: The Stonewall 4

Jughead learned of the Stonewall Four, four students who disappeared and were never seen again. Jughead nearly disappeared in this episode when he was trapped in a coffin, but that turned out to be a hazing ritual. Moose, meanwhile, really did fully disappear. 

Season 4, Episode 4: Shady Charles?

Betty was happy to believe that her half brother (who is also Jughead's half brother, don't think about it too much) is who he says he is, but we saw that he was shadily listening to her phone conversation with Jughead. He's up to something, for sure. 

Season 4, Episode 4: Riverdale Coroner's Office (Flash Forward)

Jughead's dead! Or at least he appears to be in a scene that shows Betty and FP looking down at a dead body that looks an awful lot like Jughead. This scene curiously didn't tell us when it was taking place, but we can only assume it's around the spring break shenanigans. 

Season 4, Episode 5: Forsythe Jones the First

Jughead learned a lot more about his grandfather, and there was one alumni writer who was particularly interested in that family history, and really wanted to meet Jughead's dad at a school event. 

Season 4, Episode 5: Jughead's Writing Assignment

Jughead and his writing class are currently in the midst of a contest to become the next ghostwriter of his favorite mystery books, and their assignment is to write the perfect murder. Cut to: 

Season 4, Episode 5: Biology Class, Spring Semester (Flash Forward)

FP barges into biology class, where Betty, Archie, Veronica, Kevin, and Reggie are all working.  

"Archie Andrews, Betty Cooper, and Veronica Lodge, you're under arrest for the cold-blooded murder of my son Jughead Jones," he says. 

Season 4, Episode 8: Witness Line-up

Betty, Archie, and Jughead stand in a witness line-up, with Jughead's seminar classmates confirming that yes, those are the kids they saw murder Jughead. 

Season 4, Episode 9: Dark Betty

In what appears to be the direct aftermath of Jughead's murder, Archie confirms that Jughead is dead, and then we see Betty, holding a rock, just like the one her dark self used to murder a cat (in her mind?). 

Anyway, even if it only helped for some of them, we're really happy the kids of Riverdale are finally getting the mental help they so desperately need. 

Riverdale airs Wednesdays at 8 p.m .