
It's turtle time, friends.
The Real Housewives franchise has given us so much over the years, from iconic fights to legendary vacations to line after line of Housewife-approved products. But perhaps the best gift they've given is their quotes, often accompanied by GIFs that have become universal ways of expressing ourselves on the internet.
We've taken a look back through the years and compiled a list of some of the best, most quotable lines from all the Real Housewives cities, from clapbacks to jokes to lines that made you say "What the f*&!?" and then rewind to be astonished all over again. (Prostitution Whore!)
You're gonna want to scroll on down to see the quotes that made our list, and if you've got an issue with it, just be cool. Don't be all, like, uncool.
It's a big weekend for all of the Real Housewives, as BravoCon begins tomorrow in New York City with appearances by 88 stars (and former stars) of the network and more than 50 events, with Andy Cohen presiding over many festivities. Watch What Happens Live will film its biggest episode ever, with more stars than ever on the stage at the same time, on Friday night, and you can bet there will be some reminiscing over some of the biggest franchise moments, including a few of those listed below!
"I am f--king Denise Richards, Kyle."
Denise said this in a confessional while recounting an argument with Kyle over getting glam.
"People come for me all the time. They just don't find me."
Karen Huger said this in season one and it took a whole new meaning in season three when her costars tried to ambush her at home.
"I'll tell you how I'm doing: Not well, bitch!"
Dorinda Medley is a whole mood.
"You're such a f--king liar, Camille!"
Kyle Richards exclaimed this during a face-off with former co-star Camille Grammer.
"Who gon' check me, boo?"
There is really nothing to say about this one. You know this one. It speaks for itself.
"You're a clown." and "When I called you garbage, I meant that you were garbage."
Caroline Manzo's final meeting with Danielle Staub (until the reunion) ended with some magical words and their delivery was spot on.
"So nasty and so rude."
Has somebody wronged you? Don't like their behavior? NeNe's reunion line instantly became a hit, it even made it into her tagline for the following season. Here's the GIF for your needs.
"It's Turtle Time."
Booze + Ramona = Classic lines. Another Scary Island moment that is now synonymous with getting your drank on.
"I'm Gone With the Wind fabulous!"
Kenya said this after an explosive fight with co-star Porsha Williams.
"He told me that his nickname was Girth Brooks."
Briana said Brooks Ayers, her mother's ex-boyfriend who fabricated cancer treatment documents, hit on her while she was super pregnant and at Vicki's birthday party. Briana said he wanted to show her his penis and revealed his nickname…
"Who is Adrienne Maloof in this world?"
Well, who is she?
"Get off my jock."
Bethenny's catchphrase from RHONY season seven when she felt cornered.
"Calm down! Take a Xanax!"
This was prompted by Aviva Drescher's vacation breakdown.
"You're a slut pig!"
Early Kim Richards on RHOBH provided some fascinating lines, including this insult hurled at Brandi Glanville when the sisters Richards were united.
"Surprrriiiissseeeeee, Hiiiii!"
Just when Scary Island couldn't get any more dramatic, Jill Zarin showed up and shocked everybody. Her arrival caused Alex McCord to have a breakdown, Bethenny Frankel sat in silence and a rift between Ramona Singer and Jill was formed. Classic.
"Bye wig!"
Once upon a time NeNe and Kim did not get along. NeNe started referring to Kim as "wig" for obvious reasons and it has become an important part of our pop culture lexicon, naturally.
Luann de Lesseps: "You came in, in your Herman Munster shoes…"
Alex McCord: "They're Louis Vuitton."
Luann: "Well, even Louis Vuitton makes mistakes."
Alex McCord came down the stairs in Morocco like a buffalo, according to Luann, but the real gold came when they sat down to discuss their issues. Do you own a pair of Herman Munster shoes?
"GO TO SLEEP!"
Scary Island gave viewers so much, including Bethenny Frankel shouting at Kelly Bensimon—who was having a moment of some kind—to go to sleep. GO TO SLEEP!
"OK, satchels of gold."
??? And jellybeans for all.
"Pay attention, puh-lease."
The moment that started it all. It being Teresa Giudice's freakout over the book and Danielle Staub in general.
"Prostitution whore!"
OK, really Teresa's whole table flip speech should be here, because it's a work of art, this is just the most obvious choice. But for your own enjoyment: "I am paying attention! Obviously there has to be something else. It's just not name change and arrested. There has to be something else. Are you stripping? You were stripping. Prostitution whore! You were f--king engaged 19 times! You f--king stupid bitch!"
"You are psychotic, Jesus Jugs!"
Before Tamra Judge found religion, she called Alexis Bellino this wild insult at a RHOC reunion.
"What are you doing here without Dorinda?"
What is anybody doing at Beautique without Dorinda? It's the only reason to go to Beautique. Sonja Morgan spotted Dorinda Medley's man, John, there without her and, well, confronted him. The rest is history.
"I am very rich, bitch."
She's got that Trump check, guys.
"Is 'bitch' better?"
Teresa Giudice called Danielle Staub honey, which Danielle had an issue with. Naturally. And Teresa's from Paterson. Don't you forget.
"Close your legs to married men."
Words to live by.
"Be cool. Don't be all, like...uncool."
Instantly iconic the moment viewers got a glimpse of this scene in the trailer. Luann even made a song about it. Sort of. Acceptable to use when your friends are being drama queens.
Stay tuned to E! News for the lastest from BravoCon this weekend!
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