The 20 Most Awkward Choices Made on The Bachelor Premiere

From live shows to fruit balloons, a lot of weird decisions were made over the course of tonight's premiere

By Lauren Piester 08 Jan, 2019 4:00 AMTags
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Another journey to find love has begun, and thus so has our journey to deal with the mountains of secondhand embarrassment that come with one guy dating 30 women at once (and with a live show filled with Bachelor franchise stars). 

To be totally fair to the participants on The Bachelor, that's a tough situation for anybody. We wouldn't know how to handle it, and we're quite sure if there were cameras in our face we would also end up handing a man a box of no underwear or a bag of nuts or a balloon shaped like an apple (not a cherry). We too would also probably end up giving him our dog out of last minute desperation, though we'd immediately want that dog back. 

It was clear throughout tonight's big season 23 premiere some of the contestants and also Colton Underwood himself had succumbed to the naturally awkward nature of dating on TV, so we've compiled a ranking of the night's most interesting decisions, from least to most awkward. 

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The Bachelor Season 23: Meet Colton Underwood's 30 Contestants
ABC

The Sloth

You'd think this were one of the more awkward choices of the night, but Alex D.'s commitment to the life of a sloth (walking slowly, talking slowly, hanging out in trees) made this work weirdly well, especially when the mask was removed and she revealed that she's actually the fastest talker of them all. She may have walked away without a rose, but we'll never forget her. 

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This Dancing 

Katie loves to dance, that's for sure. It's also for sure that she's a better dancer than we are, but is she an objectively good dancer here in this clip with some royalty free background music that doesn't go with the moves? We can't say she is. 

ABC

The Box of Butterflies

Super cute concept and idea (and Colton clearly enjoyed it), it was a real awkward moment with the fake butterflies just sort of falling on the ground. *sad trombone music*

ABC

This Relatable Dental Experience

It's so awkward when dentists talk to you with their hands in your mouth! You can't respond! 

ABC

This Bag of Nuts

Sure, sure, her last name is McNutt...but the Bachelor's not gonna call you that, Erika. 

ABC

The Fake Australian Accent

She pulled it off, but how long can she keep it up? 

ABC

This Photoshop Job

This nice lady photoshopped her dog and Colton's dog into a picture together, which is at least less creepy than photoshopping herself into a pic with Colton. 

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Meet The Bachelor Contestant Who Won Colton Underwood's First Impression Rose
ABC

This Intense Pressure

This girl quit her job (as a dancer) to meet Colton! That's a lot to deal with in the first moments you're meeting someone. 

ABC

This Cinderella Failure 

Colton greeted the girl in the horse-drawn carriage, he picked up her shoe, and yet he didn't give her a rose. Sad. 

ABC

The "Cherry" Balloon

This girl handed Colton this balloon, popped it, then said she popped his cherry. Colton thought it looked more like an apple, and we agree. 

ABC

The Live Show

What an interesting experiment ABC conducted tonight, employing former stars of the franchise to awkwardly talk to people or awkwardly sit in hot tubs (for three hours! Were Chris and Krystal not entirely prunes by the time the show was over?) or stand by as commoners proposed to each other. It took over an hour for a girl to step out of a limo and by the time it finally happened, we were tired, hungry, 

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Chris and Krystal's "Baby" Announcement

They're getting a puppy. And they announced it from the hot tub they had to live in for the whole night, which was situated sexily out in a LA parking lot. 

ABC

This Empty Underwear Box

Hey Hannah? We didn't want to know that Colton doesn't wear underwear, but thanks for that. If we were him we would have been more weirded out by that, but he gave her the first impression rose so guess we don't know anything. 

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Catherine Giving Colton Her Dog 

Why. 

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Catherine's First Interruption 

Krystal from last season, is that you? 

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Catherine's Second Interruption

Yes, Catherine, we mind. 

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Catherine's Third Interruption

Scuse me, yes, apparently you can, because you got the final rose. 

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The First Proposal 

Please make a note to never propose to us in front of a crowd of strangers on national TV. 

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The Second Proposal 

Please make an even bigger note to never propose to us in front of a crowd of a group of our own friends plus some Bachelor franchise stars on national TV after another common couple has already done the same thing! 

ABC

The Most Awkward: This Line 

"I have not dated a virgin since I was 12" is upsetting for multiple reasons that should be obvious but mainly relate to 12 being the age of A CHILD. A CHILD!! We don't want to know your dating history at this point, Demi. 

The Bachelor airs Mondays at 8 p.m. on ABC.