Well, we made it. 

Somehow, Britney Ever After—Lifetime's unauthorized Britney Spears biopic—has come and gone, and we just aren't quite sure what or why or how that was.

There were so many opportunities throughout those two hours to really live in some of the most iconic moments in the Britney's career, and instead we simply got glimpses at an alternate reality where everything was kinda familiar but not actually how we remember it, and where southern accents come and go like relationships in Hollywood. 

Did we have a good time watching Britney's life story as told by Lifetime? We can't say we did. We spent most of the movie thinking about what could have been, and also about all the GIFs we were furiously making, in order to bring you a comprehensive gif recap of all the madness. 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

This brief shot in the opening credits is the most like Britney that "Britney" ever looked through the entire movie. 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

What? Britney doesn't have anyone controlling her life! What a funny question, producer!

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

Apparently this is Britney post "Hit Me One More Time," and not pre-8th grade. 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

This tour bus has everything: Furbies, coffee machines, cool friggin' beans bunk beds, a built in TV, a DVD thingy, and most importantly, CUPHOLDERS. 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

Pour one out for Britney's poor old Louisiana boyfriend (and put it in your cupholder). 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

Somehow we had forgotten Justin Timberlake used to talk like this. We all used to talk like this in the 90s, but JT took it to a whole other level and this movie captured it well. 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

Remember when we had multiple posters of this boy and his Ramen hair all over our walls? 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

Did Britney do this? Does she laugh like this? Did a sign actually fall down behind her IRL or did that just happen on set and they went with it? 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

We're just really happy for Lifetime that "Happy Birthday" was finally added to the public domain so they could feature it in this film. 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

That tour bus really does have everything, fake virgins doin' it included. 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

Is this supposed to be Britney ditching her suit and revealing those insane sparkly flesh-colored bellbottoms? This isn't even close. 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

What the hell are those outfits because those are definitely not the iconic denim numbers that Britney and Justin once wore to the AMAs. NICE TRY.

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

Britney's mom is just as over this as we are. 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

This is also what we do while we wait for Justin Timberlake to call. 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

Our favorite moment of the entire movie: Justin's gold chain got caught on Britney's embroidered jean vest as they tried to have sex. Is this canon or did you just not have time for another take, Lifetime? 

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

Ooh. Burn.

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

Britney Ever After completely skipped over Crossroads (2002), but this scene in which she and her friend went to spy on Brad Pitt and then laughed in a car did feel kind of Crossroadsy.

Britney Ever After

Lifetime

We're going to need to see the receipts on Britney and Justin's post-breakup dance-off please and thank you. 

Britney Ever After gif

Lifetime

This, ladies and gentlemen, is all we got of Britney's infamous kiss with Madonna at the 2003 VMAs. Literally just this. 

Britney Ever After gif

Lifetime

However, the scenes concerning Britney's marriage to her hometown friend Jason Alexander were almost longer than the marriage itself. 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

Two seconds later, Kevin Federline's in the picture, looking hotter than Kevin Federline ever even dreamed of looking. 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

And Britney's also actually looking like Britney, sorta singing "I Love Rock & Roll." 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

Look at him, on break from working at Sur and filming Vanderpump Rules, we'd guess. 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

Surprise! Brown hair and a wedding! 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

This is Brit's sigh of relief after telling her manager that she's a married woman so she don't need your managing anymore, LARRY. 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

Britney got married twice and had two children in the span of like 15 minutes. 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

Glad she made sure to get that punctuation in there at the end of her divorce text. (This delights us.) 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

Ooh, girl. Britney could have actually pulled off a shaved head if she wanted. We would not recommend the same for this actress. 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

Did Lifetime even try?! It was an SUV at a gas station, not a convertible on the street. Amateurs. 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

The filmmaking in this scene got downright artistic out of absolutely nowhere. Too bad they couldn't have gotten it together for any of the performance scenes, which appeared to have been filmed in a dark closet. 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

Please. (Though if we're being honest, we got much more mad at that woman who yelled at that poor dog than we did at anything else tonight.)

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

And here's where this movie is no longer fun. 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

And where we get really sad. 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

And where we start remembering all the crap this woman and her family had to endure, and we feel bad for laughing, and we also wonder about a lot of Lifetime's decisions. (Though we will laugh at this "disguise" Brit's mom was rocking.) 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

And also where this man, Sam Lufti, makes us want to punch things. 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

And where Manny, the messenger serving Sam with a restraining order, becomes the best character in the whole movie. 

Britney Ever After gifs

Lifetime

We want that too, girl who looks nothing like Britney Spears. We want that too. 

So in general, that wasn't a disaster. There were a few moments where we were like, "Wow." But for the most part, there was too much that was missing or shown incorrectly for us to qualify that as a good Lifetime movie about Britney Spears. Why were so many scenes wrong? Why were so many outfits off? Why didn't Britney look or sound anything like Britney? Why were the stage performances, which were and are such a big part of Britney's career, so badly filmed?

We just feel like there were a lot of chances to do something fun here, and they were almost all missed. But we guess all we have to say is thank god for the way Justin Timberlake used to talk, because that comic relief was much appreciated. 

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