Guess Who Said It: The New York Times Vows Section or the Twitter Parody Account

Sorry, Vows section.

By Seija Rankin Sep 11, 2015 7:09 PMTags
Married Couple, Wedding, HorseGetty Images

Weddings. They're a time for celebrating love in its purest form, gathering together your closest friends and family, and having one beautiful, gratitude-filled party. 

Unless you're rich.

If your rich, they're a time for reminding all of your guests that your parents own a farm in Vermont and that your soon-to-be-husband has an MBA from Wharton. And there's no better place for WASPs to set the tone for their nuptials than the New York Times Vows section. How else would you announce your love and also casually mention that you'll be honeymooning on your own private island where Prince William and Kate Middleton once stayed? 

The Vows section has become such an arbiter of rich East Coasters who also have horses and a classic convertible in their garage upstate that it's practically a pox on your wedding if you're not featured. And that's why it's the perfect subject of a Twitter parody.

Enter @NYTvows, the new account that pretty much hit the wedding section on the nose. In just 140 characters they manage to capture the essence of Times wedding announcement so perfectly. It's actually a marvel of the English language.

Since this account is just so good, it begs for a quiz: Who said it? The New York Times Vows section or @NYTvows. Let's play.

1. "The groom, Wentworth Graham Matson Wenstrup IV, goes by Tuck at the racquet club."

2. "Their reception was an intimate affair that included their 700 closest confidantes enjoying a raw bar on The Intrepid."

3. "The bride and groom met on the Hampton Jitney, the only form of public transportation that either has ever ridden."

4. "Ms. Masten, 36, had become enthralled with a European sensibility of food and wine after studying abroad as a teenager."

5. "As an undergraduate at Georgetown University, she studied Chinese, economics and medicine; worked as an emergency medical technician; ran marathons; and wrote extra papers for classes if she didn't feel challenged enough."

6. "She was a runner intent on finishing a marathon on every continent, he was happy to come along for the ride."

7. "They were married on April 18 at the Annapolis, Md., home of the groom's best man, Jeffrey Zients, who is director of President Obama's National Economic Council."

8. "The bride earned a Bachelor's degree in Russian Studies from Yale and a Master's degree in social work from NYU, neither of which she uses."

9. "Whitney Beck didn't know which lax bro she would date when she arrived at Princeton, but she knew just the type of blood diamond she wanted."

10. "The reception vision was 'hot to trot,' and a tiny jockey stood at the center of each dinner table to bring home that unique theme."

Answers: 1) @NYTvows 2) @NYTvows 3)@NYTvows 4) The New York Times 5) The New York Times 6) The New York Times 7) The New York Times 8) @NYTvows 9) @NYTvows 10) @NYTvows

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