Thank you, Jeff Probst.
Survivor: Nicaragua's Emmy-winning host refused to let the game's latest victim accept defeat at tonight's Tribal Council, instead exhorting them (admittedly while channeling his mother) to join forces with the other outcasts and vote for one of the remaining alliance members.
He even calls for a specific target.
So did Jeff's last-ditch efforts to shake things up succeed?
Alas, no. Not even Jane, the season's 13th casualty, was buying what Jeff was selling.
With the smallest chance that Fabio and Dan might take Jeff up on his generous offer to oust Holly instead, Jane voted for Sash.
She knew he would use his Hidden Immunity Idol (it was the Castaways' last chance to cash in, and Sash would rather have a million dollars than a token souvenir), so her vote was nothing more than a parting shot at her betrayer.
Putting Out Fire...With Gasoline: Jane didn't wait for Tribal Council to express her fury at her "lying" and "cheating" former alliance. Unfortunately, her ceremonial dousing of the campfire—which she did build, starting on day one without flint—also annoyed her other tribemates and potential allies, Dan and Fabio.
P-P-P-Poker Face, P-P-P-Poker Face: If Evo by Sprint spokesman Chase wasn't intending to let his Carolina buddy know she was on the chopping block, Holly's deer-in-the-headlights poker tell revealed all. At least her former alliance had the balls to tell her the truth—not that she appreciated it.
Heart Failure: Another person playing with his heart instead of his head tonight was Fabio, whose wailing over missing time with his mama was like watching E.T. go home. But he channeled his anger to a victory in the Immunity Challenge—and his puzzle mastery proved once again that he's much smarter than everyone is giving him credit for.
Oh, Danny Boy: Tribal Council wasn't the first time we witnessed Chase's "look of utter confusion"—he actually made a case to vote out Dan. Although I would've jumped for joy, no one is stupid enough to vote out that deadweight yet. (Note: I'm not made of stone—Dan's adoration of his sons made me reach for the Kleenex. I just think it would be better for everybody if he spent more time with them and less time wasting space on this game.) But no way would Sash let Dan join him in the final three, knowing that a resentful jury could go all Natalie White on his ass.