Who does Dr. Phil think he is? The man becomes a grandfather without informing Oprah the second the tyke's glistening scalp hit the glaring light of delivery room. Big mistake. Maybe he doesn't remember who made him, who put his little dog-and-pony psych advice show on TV? 

Listen buster, next time your son knocks up his Playmate wife, just remember one thing. All it takes is a couple phone calls from you-know-who, and you'll be back doing motivational seminars at the Tulsa Holiday Inn.

Catch more Dish Saturday nights at 10 p.m. ET/PT on the fabulous Style Network! Oprah says you better!