Chris Weeks/Getty Images
Sorry, ladies. Those of you who haven't been treated to Tiger Woods in the buff won't be getting a peek anytime soon. At least from the folks who brought us a nearly naked Levi Johnston.
"Playgirl has decided to turn down the alleged Tiger Woods nude photos, reportedly taken by camera phone by Woods himself," Daniel Nardicio, director of marketing for Playgirl.com, tells People. "This is a prime example of the direction Playgirl does not want to take. I prefer subjects who are willing."
Speaking of unwilling, alleged Woods mistress No. 1 Rachel Uchitel ain't going to share, either.
"Rachel will not be appearing in Playboy," Uchitel's lawyer, Gloria Allred, tells E! News in response to reports to the contrary.
Back to the rumored Woods shots. Team Tiger has been scrambling to lock down any such images, scoring a preemptive court order in the United Kingdom blocking any British publications from running with the shots.
The catch? Woods' camp isn't even admitting there are any photos, or as his legal eagles put it:
"Our client is not aware of any images and in any event he would not have consented to any such photographs being taken nor would he have consented to the dissemination or exploitation of the same."
In other words, keep these Woods in your bag.
Take a look back at Tiger Woods and his family in better days in our gallery!