Simon Cowell used to be the one to get up from the table in disgust and storm off if the American Idol antics got to be too much for him.
But Randy Jackson is the veteran on the panel now, and though he's usually pretty stoic, someone In Los Angeles was bad enough to get him to leave the room. And then jog back as Tynisha Roches, who toted her own prop microphone to her audition, chased him back on camera.
Ladies, leave your Frank Sinatra impressions at home from now on.
After announcing to the judges that she was going to do a tribute to Ole Blue Eyes, Roches proceeded to do anything but. Her voice wasn't happening, she stopped multiple times and blamed her nerves and then, as she was losing her audience—literally—she desperately switched into "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going."
But alas, no one's gonna love her for her singing.
"Security!" Randy yelled, calling it "the freakiest show ever." (Which he's said before, but this truly may have been the weirdest one for him.)
They don't call L.A. the entertainment capital of the world for nothing, though.
Cooper Robinson, 59, who said he owns a "very dangerous" plantation in Arkansas, was probably hoping to be the next Gen. Larry Platt, but he didn't bring his own original pants-provoking creation. Instead, he just butchered some James Brown and probably won't be back for the season finale, even though he's "more good-lookin', more handsomest than any dog, chicken, giraffe, snake, cow, pig, hog, or what."
But there was some worthwhile entertainment, too!
Tim Halperin, who's been crushing on Jennifer Lopez forever, wooed her and Steven Tyler (but not Randy) with some Maroon 5. Adorable brothers Mark and Aaron Gutierrez can now lean on each other in Hollywood.
And it turns out Heidi Khzam could sing as well as belly dance, which she did (for what seemed like ages), while Tyler provided the tambourine sounds.
We'll be expecting another apology next week, when Idol touches down in San Francisco.
(Originally published Feb. 3, 2011, at 7:45 p.m. PT)