The Awful Truth

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It's no shock we adore Kristen Stewart here at the AT. We had the pleasure of meeting her again yesterday at the New Moon junket and press conference in LA, and K.Stew truly didn't disappoint, again.

First off, she looked totally hot rocking her slightly grown out Joan Jett hair pulled back a bit with a black blazer and one of her standard quirky tees underneath. While K battles a few haters out there we think the babe's a breath of fresh air. Finally—not another cookie-cutter Hollywood bimbo. Her boy, Robert Pattinson, is kind of the guy equivalent of that, too.

After the press conference KS stopped real fast to chat with us on her way out, ‘cause we just had to know: would she work with Rob, or any of the cast, again after all these Twilight flicks are over?

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Kevork Djansezian/Getty Images; Kevin Mazur/Getty Images

Dear Ted:
In your last Bitch-Back you said Angelina is waiting for Brad 2.0 to be her next target. Would this 2.0 have to be a younger man (à la Robert Pattinson) or does age not matter? I just heard a rumor that she might be doing a movie with Johnny Depp. Not that he could be lured away, but would he qualify in your book?
—Emmy

Dear Cougar Attack:
Depp def qualifies. We'll see what happens in their new film together...think we're gonna see a repeat of Pitt-Aniston situation?

Dear Ted:
Remember how a few weeks ago you spoke about a certain Twi castmember that would be talking about going gay? Did you happen to catch Nikki Reed's line in U.K. Glamour? If not, allow me to refresh your memory. When asked if she believes in soul mates she said: "I believe in multiple people. People are born with this desire to connect, that's why with girls the line is blurry. Is it a friendship? Is it a relationship?" Was she saying girls are a bunch of teases, or was she finally confessing to swaying the other way?
—Kanderson 

Dear Niksten:
Hey, she was close with Kristen; then that kinda died when Rob came into the picture. I'm saying it means something other than what we all think. There's definitely a story coming up for sure! But no, Nikki is neither Terry Tush-Trade or Rocky Trailer. 

Dear Ted:
Who's going to be People magazine's Sexiest Man Alive this year? Toothy Tile? Has he ever held that title?
—Mackenzie 

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Dear Ted:
Am I the only one that found it ironic when Natalie Portman basically compared eating meat to condoning rape, considering that as a signer of the Roman Polanski petition she actually is condoning rape? I like her as an actress but that kind of crap is seriously making me rethink.
—Bridget 

Dear Pissed Off Portman:
Now, I love N.P., but I'm not a fan of some of her beliefs. Obviously, the comparison exists, and it's not a great one. Maybe she should say she's sorry like I did.

Dear Ted:
I know you keep saying Tay-Tay is for publicity, but are they emotionally and physically attracted to each other? I love Tay-Tay.
—Jamie 

Dear Hopes for TaySquared:
Duh—they are horny teenagers, after all.

Dear Ted:
I am what is referred to as a "Balehead" because I am somewhat of a Christian Bale fan...OK maybe an obsessed fan! I have to know: Has Christian Bale ever been a B.V.?
—Tex  

Dear B-Brain:
So are members of Team Awful. But the answer's no. What needs to be blinded about that boy's issues? They're already out there!

Dear Ted:
OK, I get the whole I'm a young celebrity who is trying to be a badass stoner, but its totally getting old. I don't care what people think of me either but damn, Kristen Stewart, a shower and stylist wouldn't kill you. And I also get the whole hush-hush about Robert Pattinson and Kristen being together or not. She's on the big screen and if Kristen didn't want people knowing about how effed up she was, then she should have been a waitress.
—Cherry

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Summit Entertainment

It's the first time in a year and a half, so please be kind (I know you won't, but whatever) about this week's break for Truth, Lies & Ted. Good news is E!'s training a fab new producer after the departure of our illustrious Brian Walmsley, who will be much missed.

But starting next week, Truth will be even more deliciously and tattletale Truthful, with some added dish departments. Call it a "new moon" for a new bitch, if you will.

I've also been filming...

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Istockphoto.com

There's a humpy dude who's still gorgeous and who used to be on a hit TV show that was often centered around lots of sand, and lots of boobs.

Let's call him Sandy Boob then, shall we?

Sure is pretty, that Sandy! He's also notoriously horny, and has been for many, many years, which, for the record, is about as much time it's been since Sandy's been a relevant player in the biz. Hmm. Could that be why Sandy's suddenly getting less and less discreet about the fact that he likes to do what Crotch Uh-Lastic does, i.e, seduce guys to watery locales? 

Yeah, probably, but guess what? Now that Sandy's career is on hiatus (and has been for some time), Sandy's friends tell us Mr. Boob decided for that very reason to start...

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Marion Curtis/PictureGroup

Talk about quite the frenzy yesterday when Kristen Stewart was spotted with a "mystery man." We weren't even gonna make a big deal about it because, well, it's not.

Can't a guy and a girl be friends anymore? Especially if the friend is a relative?

K.Stew was leaving L'Ermitage Hotel in the same kinda car her brother drives, so let's just close the nasty anti-Robsten rumor mill on that, 'K?

Now, Robert Pattinson and Kristen start their publicity somewhat together in Los Angeles today...

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Lester Cohen/Getty Images; Jon Kopaloff/Getty Images

The hunt's been on for as long as Angelina Jolie's been working men—and women. Closeted quasi-hunky movie star Toothy Tile has legions of folks wondering who he is, and he's become our biggest Blind Vice superstar.

While Toothy's busy—chatting up fellow not-out gay stars or apparently trying to go straight—we're gonna help the guessing game along. In more of a, uh, back-door kinda way.

See, we're going to tell you fab detectives who Toothy isn't!

Behold our People Who Are Not Toothy Tile gallery! We'll start updating this more often so you sexy sniffers can see the fellas who most definitely are not the erstwhile closeted T.T. And keep the guesses coming!

__________

Get clues to his identity in our People Who Are Not Toothy Tile gallery!

ABC/Michael Yarish

OK, after our pals over at Watch With Kristin confirmed James Franco was indeed set to appear in the daytime soap General Hospital, we were all for this countercasting.

It's a ballsy move for a Golden Globe winner to backtrack, but this is the kinda actor who really loves his craft, ya know?

After seeing these shots of James on the set of G.H., though, we're so disappointed! Aren't soap operas about crazy overly dramatic plots with...uh, lots of sex? Where's shirtless James Franco?

Obviously J.F. looks doable in the dark suit, but come on. This is his red carpet look. We'd tune in to this daytime soap to see a new side of James. And a nearly naked, or at least more sexily outfitted, side wouldn't hurt, either. Calling Dr. Jimmy Feel-Good, already!

But would you call in sick just to catch this dude in daytime duds?

________

Peep some other questionable hotties in our Would You Do...? gallery!

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By now we're sure many of you have watched, or heard about, the first part of Rihanna's interview with Diane Sawyer.

We've been giving Chris Brown a hard time for quite a while now (and still don't plan on letting him off the hook while he makes douchey moves), and even got a little pissy that Ri-Ri had stayed mum for so long.

But watching R talk about the assault back in February, we realized two important things:

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Buchan, Shirely, PacificCoastNews.com

We have to weigh-in on Strippergate—ya know, how Josh Duhamel supposedly cheated on Fergie and had "lots of sex" with Tattletales employee Nicole Forrester...and then some.

At first it sounded like another National Enquirer throwaway, but the more we hear this (albeit not-so-articulate) stripper speak, the more we're kind of coming around to the idea that something's up with Duhamel's extracurricular activities.

And this is hardly the first time:

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British GQ

Dear Ted:
Nicole Kidman told GQ she is into "strange sexual fetish stuff." She's always been pretty reserved about her life, and now she is giving Angelina a run for her money. Too bad it's 10 years too late and no one cares about her anymore. She used to be so classy, why is she so desperate?
—Mole

Dear Always a Reason:
Australia was a bomb, largely because of Nic. Maybe now that she's being pooh-pooh'd as a serious actress (which is insane; she used to be one of best before she got lost on Bewitched Boulevard) she's trying to reinvent herself. I think she should go a different route. Like letting her forehead do what it damn well wants, for starters.

Dear Ted:
Have you ever been "used" by a source to get a false story out there without you knowing it? Has it ever occurred to you that Deep Twi is actually on the Summit payroll to "leak" these juicy details? Personally, couldn't care less if they're really a couple or not—they both need acting lessons. But have you ever in the past been bamboozled?
—SarahT

Dear Trick or Treat:
Good question. Fair one, too. But trust, Deep Twi is about as legit as you're gonna get. And a friend (so that's why I know).

Dear Ted:
Is there any way you can put up a separate "area" where the New Moon/Kristen Stewart/Robert Pattinson posters can analyze, dissect and argue separately from the rest of us? It is becoming too much to slog through all their turmoil.
—Polly

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Another day, another Robsten non-denial. We're sorry, anti-Twilighters, because the next few weeks are going to be absolute hell for you.

Kristen Stewart chatted with Entertainment Weekly recently in Vancouver and had to attempt to answer the dreaded dating question—again.

"I probably would've answered it if people hadn't made such a big deal about it," K.Stew said. "But I'm not going to give the fiending an answer. I know that people are really funny about 'Well, you chose to be an actor, why don't you just f--king give your whole life away?! Can I have your firstborn child?'"

The most interesting part? How poor Rob tried to put in his two cents but was totally denied!

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