The Awful Truth

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Any excuse to put up a picture of Natalie Portman is OK by us!

Nat celebrated the premiere of her new flick Brothers and looked absolutely yumma-do-me while doing it. But a little on the thin side, no? Guess that's Hollywood for ya.

Love the hair, love the makeup, love the dress. Her 'do looks classy, while the strapless mini, busty-bouquet number keeps her looking young. We forget the age of this mature Harvard alum sometimes, but we do know that that vibrant blue hue is impeccable.

One thing missing from the party was costar Jake Gyllenhaal.

Is that because he was home playing with his hair?

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Steve Granitz/Getty Images; ABC/RICK ROWELL

Are Rihanna and Drake set to make sweet music together—and then some?

Both Ri-Ri and her rumored boyfriend hit up the American Music Awards...not entirely together. But during commercial breaks, all eyes were on whether the two good-lookin' peeps would get their flirt on. (They didn't, BTW, since they hardly interacted.)

In Hollywood, that could be a sign that something is going on. (Robsten, anyone?)

Here's what we could get outta Drake:

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After grueling months of promotion for New Moon, the Twilight cast has been finding some time to unwind in New York City. All while their li'l film dominates the box office.

Friday night Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart skipped out on the New Moon afterparty and opted for a more private party together at Avenue in NYC, even showing some PG PDA.

The couple also supposedly hit the town together last night.

Rob was photographed leaving trendy eatery Megu in Tribeca, but Kristen was nowhere in paparazzi sight.

How is it possible that they keep going to all these places without getting photographed together? Could it be because K.Stew just really wasn't there?

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Everyone wants a status update on Rocky Trailer—one of the many bisexual stars caught up in the Twilight mega franchise.

Clearly none of the New Mooners blabbed about their tendencies to swing both ways. Ya know, getting turned on by guys and girls.

This doesn't come as that big of a surprise to us. Like we said, we'd believe it when we heard it. It's always easier for an actor to think they'll break boundaries by coming clean about their sexuality, but so few ever do.

Our own Taryn Ryder encountered Rocky very recently and actually and had quite the run-in...

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Dear Ted:
One of my favorite shows on TV is Gossip Girl, but I've got to know if there is any dirt on the costars? Seems as if Blake Lively and Leighton Meester don't get along too well. Also does anyone else, besides Chace Crawford of course, have a Blind Vice?
—Melia

Dear G.G. Gossip:
When Team Awful has spotted the two girls out partying, the two girls haven't even acknowledged each other. Battle of the egos, I'm thinking. As for being B.V. subjects, Chacey-poo is the only one holding down the naughty G.G. fort.

Dear Ted:
This is completely random, but did you know that if you made Tom Cruise a blond, he would look just like Peter Facinelli? It's creepy! On a completely different note, who's Terry Tush-Trade? For the love of all that's holy and good, Ted (I know you're a devout Presby)! I have to know. Your loving, devoted and faithful followers want, need, to know. Please! It's almost Christmas ya know. Spill!
—Bubble 

Dear Twins:
Um, no way will Facinelli ever look like Cruise. You might be right, but I refuse to imagine it. As for TTT, my lips are sealed until Terry's are not. Or until he gets caught with one of those damn flipcams.

Dear Ted:
It is 4 a.m. here in Chicago, and I am up sipping tea to sooth my never-ending sore throat. I just saw a snippet of Robin Robertson's interview with Janet Jackson. She was talking about M.J.'s death and her family's attempt at interventions. She also puts it out there who she blames for her brother's death. Although she looked beautifully madeup and composed in the interview, her eyes looked so sad. Any thoughts? Is Janet really speaking from the heart?
—Irish_blue

Dear Questioning Heartache:
Janet speaks more from the heart, whereas Joe speaks more from the pocketbook. But there are still many things left unsaid in this family.

Dear Ted:
I just don't think Taylor-Squared is real. With the obvious hints in interviews and how it's conveniently getting them more attention around the rerelease of her album and the release of New Moon, it just seems too perfect. And if Taylor Swift's a good friend, she wouldn't date Selena Gomez's ex. It just doesn't make sense.
—Robs 

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Sony Pictures

— "Not in the health he was in. Not in the state he was in."

Singing sensation Melissa Etheridge at the American Music Awards when we asked her whether she thought Michael Jackson would have been able to pull off his planned tour.

Although Etheridge told us she hasn't seen This Is It, yet, it doesn't sound like she needs to. Like we've said before, the film is wonderful, but doesn't do anything to hide MJ's frail frame at the time.

Melissa added that she plans to see the film because she's heard it showcases Jackson's "genius and talent."

Have you all seen it yet? You've only got a week or so—we suggest you check it out. It is a truly remarkable piece of work, but we really don't think Michael would have been able to survive the tour, anyways.

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People

Dear Ted:
A.T. is part of my early morning ritual, helping me start the day on a light (or juicy) note before diving into work. Johnny Depp as People's Sexiest is fine by me—he's certainly doable and sexy—but what in the world has he done to his face? I swear I didn't even recognize him in that picture. What do you make of the recent changes to his face, and do you think he can tell how strange he looks? I've got nothing against fillers and corrective treatments—if they're done right the results can be rejuvenating and natural-looking—but it seems like so many stars go overboard or get terrible work done. Why is that? You'd think a big star would be choosier and go to the best. Also, why would People choose such a terrible photo for the cover and why would his people approve that ugly mug shot? Thanks!
—Kitty

Dear Depp Be-Gone:
I think the front pic isn't all that bad; it's pretty hard to make Depp look ugly.

Dear Ted:
I have some questions regarding Bradley Cooper. I get the feeling that he is a colossal egomaniac. There are never pictures of him out with friends. Does he have famous friends, and if so, who are they? I don't think he is gay, but there is something about his personality he is hiding from us, am I right?
—Emma 

Dear Hermit Crab:
Coop isn't showing his true self, that's for sure. Totally doable, as he may be.

Dear Ted:
I was wondering if you ever get threatened by publicists whenever you publish a Blind Vice or other items rendering a particular celebrity's image suspicious. Aren't you worried for your safety? I admire you for putting the truth out there, or at least the best you can.
—Big Fan

Dear Worrywart:
You've got no idea, babe! I'm more concerned about a backlash of Twilight fans than publicists, though. They're toughass mothers!

Dear Ted:
OK, you've given us a list of 12 guys who are not Toothy Tile. How about a list of 12 guys who are not Nevis Devine? Love ya.
—Salrob 

Dear Trying Easy:
Nevis has a few more years to go until he reaches the legendary status of Toothy. I'll think about it, though. Good idea.

Dear Ted:
I'm gonna bitch. I have read you forevah but you have to stop the jumping to the next page to continue reading a storyline. It truly is fubar and takes way too long to load. (And I usually never complain about a delayed load! LOL) Love you, love the furbabies, mine's a rescued lab that has more love in his eyes than a queen has mirrors. (Scorpios are awesome, right, Ted?)
—KikiTopaz

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Summit Entertainment

Shocker—New Moon is dominating the box office. The second Twi flick grossed $26.3 million just in midnight showings. Sorry, Twi haters, but this franchise is here to stay.

We've done enough talking on New Moon this, Twilight that, so now it's your turn.

No doubt many of you are going to check out the flick this weekend, and we want to hear your thoughts. That nasty Answer B!tch posted a semigenius review of N.M. broken down into movie ratings based on your Twilight devotion.

As you all head to the theater to check out not very much R.Pattz but more Kristen and Taylor, let us know if you think Twilight 2 lives up to its hype.

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Hate Twilight? Here's what your missing in our New Moon Rising gallery.

INFphoto.com

New Moon is going to open huge today, no doubt about it, so it's never too soon to look ahead. 

We recently chatted with producer Bill Bannerman and screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg about what fans can expect for Eclipse—the third film in The Twilight Saga, due next summer. Many reports have called it much darker, with new director David Slade (Hard Candy, 30 Days of Night), so we asked if the PG-13 audience would still be able to hang. 

Plus, we've got more updates for you on the fate of Breaking Dawn...

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ABC/Ron Tom

"Five."

—So reveals our inside Desperate Housewives source regarding the total number of deaths resulting from this season's cliffhanger plane catastrophe. We're told it's the result of two passengers on the small aircraft getting into an argument

They die, too, by the by, as do some darling, dear residents on the ground on Wisteria Lane. Gosh, think those might be Teri Hatcher and her crackhead dietician up there in that plane bitching away? Never know! And let's hope!

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See what other shows are up to in the Spoiler Stills: TV gallery.

Darlings, we were going to give you a New Moon Vice update, but for all of you who are so sick of vampires you could cry blood, we'll reward you by bringing back an oldie but yummy goodie. 

Remember Crotch Uh-Lastic, the hunky, rising male star who would hire men to come back to his Hills pad, dress up in some swim trunks and get the naughty party started?

We can't believe it's almost been two years, but Crotch has officially risen, like a hunky hero out of burning celeb-saturated waters! Mr. Uh-Lastic has solidified himself as a respected Hollywood actor, which means it's time to be even more discreet 'bout his homolicious ways...

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Jason LaVeris/Getty Images; Lisa O'Connor/ZUMApress.com; DandG

While supporting fellow rock babe Mary Weiland during her book party (Fall to Pieces) at Book Soup in West Hollywood, Dave Navarro told me he's "Team Nobody," when I asked if he was on Edward's or Jacob's bus.

"I'm an adult," sniffed Carmen Electra's tattooed and famously ablicious ex, with more derision than I have for stars like Paris Hilton who buy dogs from puppy mills. 

Jeez, who does this dude think he is, Miley Cyrus or something?

Why can't the Red Hot Chili Pepper pot share the vampire love, already? I mean, he kinda looks like one, right? 

"Yeah, I started this look," insisted the bearded demi-dude all in black and multiple tatts.

"Gosh, Dave, you're not even into True Blood?" I asked. 

Suddenly, Navarro looked like I'd said he has the most unbeatable tummy muscles in the world:

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