The Awful Truth

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Kim Kardashian starting the party early last night without Super Bowl contender and supercute BF Reggie Bush at STK in Miami.

The once-most-famous Kardashian, dressed sexy as ever in a cream-colored blazer and burgundy dress, was dining with BF replacements Kris Jenner and her best gays, Lance Bass and Jonathan Cheban.

So where was the boyfriend?

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Sam Sharma/ Jeff Steinberg, PacificCoastNews.com

Pink finally lives up to her name.

Grabbing lunch with a gal-pal at Stanley's Restaurant, Pink ditched her usual fauxhawk, flannel shirt and motorcycle boots. Instead, she went full-on Stepford Wife, complete with a floral top and her hair pinned back with a barrette. Yes, you read that right: a barrette.

What the ef? Is the raucous pop star once so hardcore she used an exclamation mark in her name losing her edge?

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Secretia Ohio and Chester Shorts-Off are as horny as they are famous—just don't think they're so hot for each other, that's all. Hmmm. Certainly explains some very tabloid-messy love sitches the two have been caught in, more than once.

But let's back up:

Secretia, an impressively put-together gal of verve, good looks and surprising steeliness, has long gotten it on with tons o' guys, even though the public pretty much doesn't know. And some folks were a bit surprised when she married Chester, an incredibly talented dude who's always so busy keeping his gorgeous face smiling, no one's really stopped to think what a slut he is.

But major STD-alert? Man, is he ever:

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Jesse Grant/Getty Images; AP Photo/Chris Pizzello

Say it ain't so!

We all totally heart Lady Gaga and her ridiculous ways. It's why she's music's saving grace right now! But according to members of Gaga's inner circle, the Hollywood pressure is really starting to take its toll on the once rebellious gal.

But could it all be 'cause she's crushing on that dude we're all crushing on?

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Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images

Dear Ted:
John Mayer said recently he was tired of girls with "daddy issues." It seems to me that is the only type of girl who would put up with his crap, particularly after his Rolling Stone interview. Any well-adjusted woman would run screaming from his games—save, perhaps, Taylor Swift? Please tell me the rumors aren't true. He seems so smug as he ruins one woman's reputation after another and Taylor seems naive enough to fall for his smarminess.
—F

Dear Hopefully Not So Naive:
Well this much I have to say: If Tay ditches polishing her new collection of Grammys to hook up with D-bag John Mayer, she won't be getting one of the Love Story romances she always sings about. I'm thinking less glass slippers and ballrooms and more penicillin and ball gags. Could her audience take the Alanis Morissette Taylor? Doubt. Don't think she could, either, pray that babe wises up pronto, though I don't believe she has.

Dear Ted:
Love the article about Tom Cruise's Oscar. Got another wishful thinking Oscar contender for ya: How about our favorite R.Pattz playing Holden Caulfield? I think he would be perfect! I was wondering if it would be any easier to secure the rights to Catcher in the Rye now that J.D. Salinger has passed away. Maybe Summit can put their money bags and masterful manipulation to good use for R.Pattz for a change! And R.Pattz at the Oscars? Hot!
—Jenn

Dear Robert in the Rye:
No plans yet for a Catcher in the Rye movie, but J.D. himself—who made it his mission to keep the movie from being made while he was alive—accepted the fact that there could be a postmortem adaptation. But Summit is going to have to cough up some big-time dough if they expect to outbid the likes of Steven Spielberg or Harvey Weinstein for the rights. Gosh, think they have it? We all know that Rob can play the moody rebel perfectly, so why not try it in something a little more esteemed than the Twi franchise. I, too, see the nominations now!

Dear Ted:
I love what you do and, I must say, you keep me very entertained. I just want to wish you a very hot and steamy night this upcoming Valentine's Day. Also, will that movie Valentine's Day with all those actors be any good? I'd hate to waste money and a good date on it if it's not.
—Narissa

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Will Brangelina set the record straight about their troubled romance? Oh no! Has the media pressure caused Robsten to call it quits? Plus, guess who looked Gaga-gorgeous at the Grammys, and which inept stars need to be examined for fashion disorders?

__________

Catch up on all the Truth, Lies & Ted juiciness here.

George Pimentel/Getty Images

James Franco hitting up the Damien Hirst opening at the Gagosian Gallery in NYC recently.

Franco kept up his Sundance-sexy, as we're told he looked "hot all bundled up."

He also ran into a certain someone in the elevator who intrigued him...

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Will Ragozzino/Getty Images

"I wonder if it's the same Tiger Woods Ambien-sex thing. Wouldn't surprise me a bit. John Edwards is as smarmy as they come and has been for years and years. He totally squicks me out."

—Top (female) Washington insider. She works in the same Potomac circles now kicking out the scandalized Edwards, after, you know, the mistress, the out-of-wedlock kid, the reported sex tape, the cover-up voice mails, the multimillion-dollar conspiracy accusations. You know, just your standard Washingtonian way of life.

Hmmm. Seriously, Johnnie, what is your excuse?

____________

See which celebs get cozy with power in our Hollywood Gets Political gallery.

Annie Leibovitz for Vanity Fair Magazine

Vanity Fair recently debuted its "New Hollywood" issue featuring (from left to right) Abbie Cornish, Kristen Stewart, Carey Mulligan, Amanda Seyfried, Rebecca Hall, Mia Wasikowska, Emma Stone, Evan Rachel Wood and Anna Kendrick.

Sure, these babes are über-talented and ones to watch.

Uh, only problem being most of these gals are not "new" to Hollywood, and V.F. totally neglects to incorporate any diversity into this issue whatsoever.

Where are...

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AP Photo/Stephen Chernin

Enough's enough. What is the friggin' deal with Brad's chin warmer?

Some say Angie's man is doing the whole the mountain-man look for his upcoming film The Lost City of Z, where he's set to play Col. Percy Harrison Fawcett, who went missing in the Amazon back in 1925.

Uh, only problemo?

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AP Photo/Peter Kramer; Ferdaus Shamim/Getty Images

Dear Ted:
Can we all just stop for a minute and give praise to Anna Kendrick? She is amazing and more than just Bella's human friend in Twilight. Not only is she on Vanity Fair's front cover with Kristen Stewart, she is getting a lot of praise for her role Up in the Air. I think she is a prime example of how a little screen time on a successful movie franchise plus a lot talent can spring someone into stardom. It doesn't hurt that she also got to work with George Clooney. Wonder who will get an Oscar first, Anna or Kristen?
—Faye

Dear Appreciation:
Both are stars in their own right, and I have a feeling that 2010 will be a great year for each gal. But yes, mucho applause for Ms. Kendrick, who has actually been nominated for an Oscar. Tho, if she'd had more screen time in Twilight, wonder if it would have actually hurt her in the end. Think her two seconds was all she needed to get her foot in the door—and her talent speaks for itself.

Dear Ted:
A good mom? A good mom? You have got to be freaking kidding me! There is no way Angie is a "good mom" like you called her, while she is still on her "mystery diet." Please!
—Ted Lover

Dear Nobody's Perfect:
Angie puts her kids first—think they're about the only thing that keep her from going overboard with that diet. And maybe a reason why Brad is fed up?

Dear Ted:
I'm in love with Ryan Gosling, and I'm pretty sure everyone at the AT is too. Has he ever been a B.V.? And who would you pair him up with besides your coworker?
—Interesting

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ODuran/Fame Pictures

Brad Pitt was getting back to the grind last night, leaving his Los Feliz compound for his office in Beverly Hills.

Hmmm, glad to see the still scruffy and smelly-lookin' dad is throwing himself into work, at least. Though we wouldn't mind if he put a little effort into his fading appearance.

Speaking of appearances, ya think that "bad day" with life partner Angelina Jolie is all in the past?

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