In the Closet: John Mayer Dashes, Isn't Dashing

We miss the days when all we knew about John Mayer was his songs. Who knew there was such a D-bag-behaving jigaloon behind J.M.'s former curls? Here's Johnny arriving at LAX draped in black from head to toe, looking quelle European while donning one saucy neckerchief and the beginnings of a faux-stache.

Does he think wearing all noir will keep him out of sight of the paps? Or is he being as naive as Jen Aniston? We still can't see what she sees in him besides scoring rival headlines with Angie.

The longer Jenny's with somebody, anybody—even a guy who resembles an international jewel thief—the longer pregnancy rumors can spread out. And every celeb knows that staying coy about being with baby garners the same publicity an Oscar nom does.

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