Morning Piss: No Justice in L.A.
Ap Photo/Gabriel Bouys, Pool/490/Most Wanted /ZUMAPress.com
The mistrial of Britney Spears for driving without a license is the most ridiculous thing since Phil Spector’s wig freakazoid collection—and they’re both all about the same principle, really: celebrities obfuscating issues and juries and courts with their larger-than-life appeal and, to put it quite simply (never my strong suit), trying to get out doing the right thing.
Admittedly, Phil allegedly shooting poor Lana Clarkson to death is hideously more grave an issue than Spears getting into her convertible with no driver’s license, but the fact that we, California tax payers, have had to pay for the privilege of listening to Spears’ pricey ‘n’ slick attorneys and their laughable reasoning that she doesn’t really reside in California (no, she just procreates and pays alimony here), thereby twisting stupidass driving laws, and, most importantly, confusing the poor jury so they’re deadlocked, is a crime against our public courts system, in my opinion.
You’re loaded, bitch! Pay the damn penalty, serve a friggin’ bit of tiny jail time, it’s the chicest thing round. After all, you want a comeback, right? That’ll do the trick, fer sure. As for you, Phil, you’re just as guilty of using your infamy to confuse gullible jurors, too, I say. Somebody should stuff one of your wigs down your gullet. Lana only wishes she could do the honors.
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