Bitch-Back! Is Carey Mulligan Moving On?

Readers wonder if Carey and Shia LaBeouf have called it quits

By Ted Casablanca Oct 16, 2010 11:32 AMTags
Carey Mulligan, Shia LaBeoufFame Pictures, Inc

Dear Ted:
Are Shia LaBeouf and Carey Mulligan still together? I saw Carey in London on Monday. She was sitting in a cafe with a handsome man. They seemed very close. They didn't kiss or anything, but I'm pretty sure they were a couple. I don't think Carey would betray someone, so I guess she must have dumped Shia.
—Alicia

Dear See Ya Shia:
This is how rumors get started, Alicia! Car and Shia are still very much together, but both are currently busy with work (S with Transformers and C promoting Never Let Me Go). Just because they'll occasionally be spending long hours with other good-looking folks—Rosie Huntington-Whiteley and Andrew Garfield come to mind—doesn't mean they're any less of a couple.

Dear Ted:
Just when I thought we knew the identities of Crotch Uh-Lastic and Oded Good-Head, you told us that they have "more in common than we'd think." We have looked them up and tried putting the pieces and similarities together, but (if we have them correct) there is almost nothing the same about these guys!  What gives? Are we that off in our guesses?
I still love ya even though you drive me crazy sometimes

Dear Croded:
I just had the totally bizarro image of these two hooking up. Which, actually, wouldn't be that odd for either of the guys if I think about it. But you're focusing too much on the obvious—that's what's driving you crazy. Think more free-form. Ya know, like a great song that's so bad it's good.

Dear Ted:
What's going on with Jackie Bouffant at the moment? Is he any closer to getting rid of his beard and coming out?
—Evie

Dear Just Jackie:
A whole lot of nothing, actually. Now that you mention it, where the heck has Mr. Bouff been lately? Off getting smarter, clearly.

Dear Ted:
I was a big fan of Toni Collette from her Muriel's Wedding days. I was very sad to read that you thought less of her after you met her, and then I started wondering if she has ever been one of your Blind Vices? If so, let the guessing begin!
—Carrie

Dear RiddaToni:
Nope, she's got a ‘tude that totally turns me off, but nothing worthy of Vice fame. Do still enjoy her on United States of Tara though, think she's fab. Just wish she'd be a bit more fab in real life.

Dear Ted:
No one can steal a person from someone. That fact that you people (media) keep referring to women as tramps, whores is unreal! Brad Pitt is the one that was married, he is the one that broke up his marriage. Oh, but he's a man, and you people (media) have made different rules for yourselves. It sucks! Why did no one call Russell Crowe names about Meg Ryan's marriage? Oh, right he's a man and the rules are different. Are you aware of the young woman that killed herself last week, because she was called a slut, whore etc. at school. The different rules are so harmful in everyway!
—A

Dear It's a Man's World:
Uh, have you read the column before, A? Don't think I've ever called Ange a whore—maybe a homewrecker, but Brad is just as much responsible for the split as Angie is for sinking her claws into Jen's man. And we've always made that plain. We've always been against double standards. Still, that doesn't excuse that fact that Angie wrecked that home just as much as Brad did.

Dear Ted:
I love the Awful Truth but I am getting very frustrated with you. One minute you clearly not someone, and then try to take it back. You say it is not the obvious, and then try to make it obvious. So once and for all who is Nevis Divine and who is Nelly Fang?
—L

Dear Outingpalooza:
I'm supposed to tell you because you're having a hissy fit? Hey, I'm three days off cigarettes, that crap ain't gonna work with me.

Dear Ted:
This question isn't so much about why Christina Aguilera and Courteney Cox have separated from their significant others but the timing behind the announcements. For example, it seems that Christina and Jordan Bratman have been separated for some time, yet chose now to make the announcement. Did her people choose to do it that way in the hopes that the frenzy surrounding the Cox-Arquette split would dilute the media's attention on Christina's split? It seems they do this kind of smoke and mirrors thing in politics all the time, so why wouldn't Hollywood do it too?
—Just Wondering

Dear Obvious:
And your point is...?

Dear Ted:
Why do people see Jennifer Aniston as a failure if she is better on TV than in movies? I think people should move beyond that stereotype. If she really wanted to prove the naysayers wrong, why doesn't she show off her acting chops in the theater? Too risky? I mean, if Ashlee Simpson was able to do Chicago, shouldn't Jen be able to handle it?
—Ellen

Dear Silver Screen Queen:
I would love to see Jen do a Broadway show—especially in a funnier one, she'd be killer. But Jen's main demographic is the heart of America, not those theater-lovers up in N.Y. So don't expect the curtain to rise on Aniston's Broadway career, brilliant as that move might be.

Dear Ted:
You talk about all the yummy in-shape guys, but haven't mentioned the Vampire Diaries hotties. Every guy on the show is smokin' hot; they must have personal trainers on set. Ian Somerhalder, Paul Wesley, Matt Davis, Michael Trevino, Steve McQueen etc. Give them their due, please. I have to take a cold show after the show on Thursday nights!
—Cougarized

Dear Bulky Bloodsuckers:
Was there a question in there, Coug, or are we just lusting over how absolutely gorge these guys are? I'm fine with the latter, just making sure. We'll try our best here at A.T. to keep you in constant cold water, too.

Dear Ted:
I know I'm ahead of the game since Breaking Dawn hasn't even started shooting yet, but please dust off your crystal ball and make some predictions: Will we see Nikki Reed back in the Rob, Kristen, Taylor fold offscreen since her character will be with them a lot onscreen this time? Will she be added to the Big 3's promo tour next year (à la Ashley Greene at ComicCon for New Moon)? Or is the history just too muddy for us to see these BFFs reunite? (I'm not implying they won't be professional, just curious how much lovey-dovey of days gone by we might see.)
—W

Dear Big Balls:
Oh, dear, you're asking for a mighty tall order here, hon. Suffice it to say that Nikki will see to it that the answers to most of your questions are yes.

Dear Ted:
I am so waiting to hear your thoughts on Gavin Rossdale's admission. I had heard Boy George talk about this back in the '90's and believed it. But what is your take on all of this?
—Jim

Dear Dude Looks Like a Lady:
Uh, this thing called human nature? Why people make such a fuss about sex (in all its varying, sometimes complicated forms)  in this country is just stupid.

Dear Ted:
Have you seen OK Go's music video "White Knuckles"? As a dog lover and animal advocate I think you might love it. It's three and a half minutes of awesome dogs and clever use of Ikea furniture. (It's on YouTube.) Love your gossip and animal rescue message!
—Amanda & my girl Angel

Dear Puppy Love:
Hadn't seen it, so thanks for sending along the link! Think it's totally cool that they even have a link to their site specifically to help rescues. Wish they'd cast Charlie and Margo in it though—you know they love the cameras—but I did see a German shepherd look-alike to John Boone's rescue pooch, Odessa.