Bitch-Back! What's Eating Angie?
Dear Ted:
Do you think Angelina Jolie has an eating disorder? Nobody can be so skinny after having three babies. Love Ya!
—Lieb
Dear Bones 'n' All:
She's on what we call a mystery diet. Think about it.
Dear Ted:
With all of the hoopla over Jensen Ackles getting engaged, people are speculating that one reason is that this will be Supernatural's last season. If this is indeed true, what do you think that means for Jackles (or Padackles, as I prefer to call them)? Will their epic bromance stand the test of time and new-found distance? Or will it fade into oblivion as so many friendships do?
—Next-door neighbors
Dear Bye-Bye Bromance:
If it's true bromance, they'll stay together. Have some faith!
Dear Ted:
Michael Lohan leaked those tapes for the same reason he is "friends" with Jon Gosselin: attention! He can't get any for any of his own accomplishments, so he has to mooch it off of everyone else. I am surprised he doesn't go around photo-bombing people!
—Amanda F., NYC
Dear Lohan So Yesterday:
He's an attention whore, just like his daughter...actually just like his whole fam. But we're all over it. Daddy Lohan needs to get the picture.
Dear Ted:
Are Woody Harrelson and Owen Wilson just really good friends or "really good friends"?
—J.D.
Bitch-Back! Michael Lohan's a Good Guy?
Dear Ted:
Why is everyone being so hard on Michael Lohan? Obviously leaking those voice mails to the tabloids isn't the best way to go about forcing your daughter to hit rock-bottom, but what else could he do? No other method worked to get her into rehab. Not saying I agree with it 100 percent but hey—leave no stone unturned, right? I say it just may be the push over the edge to get the help she needs. What say you?
—Nichole, Stamford, Conn.
Dear See Your Crazy and Raise You Crazier:
If Michael was really doing it in Lindsay's best interest, sure, I could see your point. But if he really cares he should go over to her house and force the girl into rehab.
Dear Ted:
Was Madonna a subject of a Blind Vice? And do you think Jesus will go Jewish for her?
—Mag
Dear Surprising One:
No, actually, the Queen is exempt. I think Jesus will do whatever the hell she tells him to. He's a sugar baby.
Dear Ted:
I have no doubt in my mind that Robsten is a real couple, and I was loving the hand-holding pics! But their timing for PDA is a little too perfect. I cannot picture Rob or Kristen agreeing to this, but please tell me the paps just got lucky and this was not set up by Summit or one of their reps?
—Sburrow
Bitch-Back! Is Ri-Ri Doing It for the Wrong Reasons?
Dear Ted:
I'm a loyal fan, but I can't believe what you wrote in your Rihanna post. Is she brave? Yes. Did she experience something no human or animal should endure? Absolutely. But how on earth can you not point out the timing of this sudden tell-all? It is a transparent PR tactic that her handlers are orchestrating. I am completely offended on behalf of all men, women and children who have experienced abuse. Does the average victim have an opportunity to exploit their ordeal in order to boost record sales and make a couple extra million dollars? No. And please, my darling Ted, spare me the "turning a negative into a positive" angle—Rihanna's handlers should feel ashamed of themselves.
—Helen
Dear I See Your Point:
And of course recognize the blatant timing of it all. But if she influences positively even one woman caught a domestic abuse situation to get out of it by her interview, then that's OK by me.
Dear Ted:
The goings-on with Chris Martin and Josh Duhamel led me to an epiphany. I support gay marriage 100 percent. Why should heteros be the only ones that have to suffer?!
—Bubbley
Dear Random Dots:
I guess...I agree?
Dear Ted:
I'm your No. 1 fan from Greece. As a writer myself, I can't tell you how much I admire your writing style. The way you play with words is just amazing. So my question is this: To me it's obvious that Robsten are an item. Whether you wanna call it friends with benefits, f--k buddies, casual hookups whenever they find some time in their busy schedules, whatever. They are so young, gorgeous, rich, famous, why would they want to commit forever and ever? I understand people's need to see their favorite actors together in real life, but I'm reading comments and questions in your column where people actually want them to get married right now and start producing babies!
—Melina
Dear Not Lost in Translation:
I think it's fans just having fun with it. Rob and Kristen don't let the crazy talk influence them, though.
Dear Ted:
Would a celeb, their PR rep or camp insider (family, friend or hired help) ever post on one of the large message boards with intent to influence public opinion or to spill some dirt anonymously? Let's use Brangie, for example.
—Doubtful
Rihanna Opens Up—Is It Enough?
By now we're sure many of you have watched, or heard about, the first part of Rihanna's interview with Diane Sawyer.
We've been giving Chris Brown a hard time for quite a while now (and still don't plan on letting him off the hook while he makes douchey moves), and even got a little pissy that Ri-Ri had stayed mum for so long.
But watching R talk about the assault back in February, we realized two important things:
Bitch-Back! The Perverts of Hollywood
Dear Ted:
I'm upset that stars I respected, like Natalie Portman and Tilda Swinton, are defending Roman Polanski. Do they actually think vaginally and anally raping a 13-year-old is no big thing, or are they cynically trying to be on his good side if he directs again? So sorry to hear about your heartache!
—Marian
Dear Good Question:
Honestly, it hurts my brain too much to try to understand some people's way of thinking. Like, get a clue, people—imagine just how that violation might feel before you sign on to condone it.
Dear Ted:
What's your take on all this Jon Gosselin nonsense? Two questions. Who is going to support this family if the show is taken away? Do you think it's in the best interest of the children for the show to end?
—Madisyn
Dear Labor Laws:
Absolutely I think the show should end. With Jon out parading his penis and its new fling every five minutes, these kids already are more likely to catch Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan syndrome. Kate may be a shrew, but she's a hardworking one at that. She'll bring home the bitchy bacon.
Dear Ted:
I just read the excerpts from the magazine article Kristen Stewart did with Interview magazine. Her level of maturity and her ability to articulate blew me away. Some consider K.S. awkward, socially inept and even "bitchy" (to use a word I hate), but I believe she was very sincere in her responses, unlike other actors who BS their way through interviews. What's your deep down, truly honest opinion of K.S.? Your insight carries a great deal of weight with your fans, especially since you have studied and interviewed her yourself. Thanks
—Ann
In the Closet: Rihanna's the New Posh
The one week out of the year we are über-pissed this column isn't run out of New York is during Fall Fashion Week. L.A. is totally dead, while all the most fabulous stars come out to play in NYC.
But one plus to being a long flight away is that when we diss a fashionista goddess, as we're about to with Victoria Beckham, she won't come kick our asses.
Look, we adore Posh.
Anyone who can claim they get to bed David Beckham regularly is clearly someone to be worshiped. And while we heart her fierce style, we're not feeling one of her more recent ensembles. Thigh-high boots are a fall must, yes, but Vicki's tight leather come-ef-me heels can really only be pulled off by...how do we say this delicately, a generation that grew up listening to the Spice Girls.
Take Rihanna, for ince. Love or hate her out-there style, this girl can rock almost anything. She's daring and has fun pressing stylish buttons. Like Posh, she too has the attitude to complement some badass 'fits, but Ri-Ri has one thing going for her: youth.
We do not consider ourselves ageists here at the A.T., but there are some looks you just can't pull off once you start moving up decade levels. It happens to us all! (My tees can't be quite as tight as they used to be.) So, Vicki, keep the cutting-edge looks coming, but let's factor in age a bit more shall we? There are new trendsetters in town.
Khloé Kardashian Blogs for the Awful Truth: Who Are Hollywood's Best and Worst Couples?
Dating in H'wood is quite the hot topic, as you all know. Makeups, breakups, sex scandals, affairs, preggersville and any sort of relationship drama you can conjure up are splashed across the pages of every major tabloid on a weekly basis.
Every time I'm linked to someone, no matter how absurd the claim, I have to take to my blog to defend myself. It's not easy dating under a microscope, people! Celebrity marriages you think are going to last forever come to a screeching halt, and the most unlikely of couples form a union and spin a reality show off of it.
It's a very strange world we're living in when it comes to celebrity dating, and it seems like everyone has something to say about the subject. Well, dolls, now it's my turn. I thought it would be fun to share my favorite and least favorite Hollywood couples, as well as play matchmaker to two hot celebs...
Celebrity Liars Love Larry King
What's with Larry King being the go-to guy for badly behaving stars who supposedly wanna start over but who end up flat out lying? In his interview with King, Chris Brown claimed that he's never been a violent person and this whole sitch with Rihanna is a total shock to him. Then can Chris explain his two prior incidents of violence, according to a probation officer's report, including the one time he shoved Ri-Ri into a wall? Of course he can't. Who needs facts when you've got a flack's words whispered into your ear?
The lying's just as bad as Brown somehow trying to excuse his "wow" comments by saying he simply misspoke and does in fact remember what happened that night with Rihanna. 'Cause if he really talked about what happened that night, he might actually have to confront his bad behavior, as opposed to apologizing for some vague, nonspecific, forgettable act.
Before Brown, of course, there were other celebs who lied right into Larry King's camera...
Double Date Night for Katy & Rihanna?
Katy Perry made her way back to Los Angeles this weekend, performing one of her tour's final shows at the Hollywood Palladium Saturday (you can watch it here). Upstairs in the VIP area, all eyes were not on "celeb" Perez Hilton who was in attendance (so cool he couldn't be bothered to take his sunglasses off the entire time inside), but rather on one of Katy's constant rumored love interests, Benji Madden.
Despite being quite short, B.M. was hard to miss with his standard fedora and tats on display. Benji was in a great mood, chatting with friends as he made a brief appearance upstairs before Katy took the stage. Mr. Madden went MIA during the show. Maybe to watch with Perry's "close friends" backstage?
After her fab performance, Katy headed over to club h.wood solo to meet new bestie Rihanna, who was not alone...
Morning Piss: Rihanna, Watch Out!
Superschmuck Chris Brown clearly can't get his mind off ex Rihanna. Last weekend he visited her fave tattoo joint, Bang Bang, and got inked by the very same dude who does Ri-Ri's tats.
This comes right after Brown conveniently booked into the same NYC hotel at the same time as Rihanna. Coincidence?
Please.
No one in the world is that gullible, so their reps shouldn't even bother calling it such. Even if Ri-Ri knew beforehand he was staying there—even if she wanted him there—the people around both Ri and C.B. (and there are always people) should've nixed that plan immediately.
There are literally thousands of hotels and tattoo parlors in New York City, so why else would C.B. pick Rihanna's to snoop around in? Is Brown trying to aggressively mark his territory? As he so aggressively did last February?
It's like a big ef-you-I'll-go-where-I-please move that shows he can't be bossed around. Or is he just following (more like stalking) Rihanna as closely as his restraining order will allow? It's friggin' creepy, and Ri needs to seriously watch her back.
Oh, and now that Brown's a total embarrassment to the music biz, and Michael Jackson's gone for good, at least Whitney Houston has a realistic chance of saving the pop scene with her promising new album, I Look To You. Thank heavens for small musical miracles.
Morning Piss: Try Harder, Chris
A lot of you think we're being too hard on Chris Brown. Well, tough s--t, 'cause we still think C.B. has some serious growing up to do. Five months later, Brown has finally released an apology for beating up his then girlfriend Rihanna. Take ya long enough, Chris?
In the video above, Brown tells everyone that he's "truly sorry" for what happened back in February. He says it took him so long to say so because his lawyer told him not to say anything until after the trial was over. Uh, whatever. Be a man and apologize anyways—that is if you truly feel bad for what happened. Chris, who pled guilty to felony assault, should have told his legal team to ef off and gotten the message out to his fans and Rihanna, publicly.
While we're glad C.B. takes full responsibility in the video, saying he won't make any excuses for what went down, we think this whole apology stunt reeks of Team Brown trying to salvage whatever career he has left. He even stumbles through his way overrehearsed lines in the beginning. Think he even wrote the damn speech?
Chris says: "I'll do everything in my power to make sure it will never happen again." Screw that! Just say it will never happen again, ass wipe. Period. And speak from the heart. Better luck next interview.
Exclusive
Friend of Chris Brown: "He's Sorry"
Too little too late, Chris Brown? You decide. We ran into the gorgeous and gracious Teairra Mari at the BET Awards on Sunday and had to chat up the babe about her notorious close bud Chris B. The two singers were up-and-comers around the same time, so we wanted to know if Teairra has had the chance to talk to Brown about the horrendous Rihanna attack and see what the hell is really going on with the handsome, cocky musician.
"He's sorry," Teairra tells the A.T. "That's my friend, and I love Chris. He's a good kid—he just made a mistake. He knows that and feels terrible about it."
Sure, but how are his fans going to know he's actually sorry and be able forgive him?



