The Awful Truth

ABC photo / Randy Holmes

We've got tons of dish for you from the entire New Moon cast and premiere, but let's get to the really good stuff first—Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart.

The two didn't snap pics together on the carpet, and no one could ask the two stars for any personal bites on each other. But we were able to squeeze some cuteness out of Rob.

Producer Bill Bannerman, by the by, told us Kristen was the Julia Child of the cast. So does Rob like her home cookin', too? And how did the two spend their day off in Madrid?

We've got all this, plus piles o' dish from the afterparty, so you'll def want to read on:

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"Everybody knows they have to die. And I have this theory that deep down in our consciousness we know it came very close to happening in our history."

—2012's mastermind and director, Roland Emmerich, talking about his end o' days baby with John Cusack and Amanda Peet that opens Friday.

Gosh, do you think Roland was referring to when George W. Bush was president? That's certainly the darkest hour that comes to our minds first.

By the way, def see 2012, not only is it the best Cusack's been in eons, the movie's a friggin' pile of blitzed-to-smithereens fun, for sure.

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For your hit-and-miss movie guide head on over to the Lyons Den.

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In an exclusive interview yesterday, New Moon's Justine Wachsberger—she plays Gianna—confirmed just how secretive Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are on set.

While she said she did not think they would hit the carpet together for the premiere next month, since Robsten is über-private, Justine did give us some fun predictions:

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"Oh man, is that is a loaded question...I think any person is tamable if they wanna be."

—Law Abiding Citizen's Viola Davis when asked if costar and perpetual bachelor Jamie Foxx is able to be domesticated.

Davis took an extra long time on the red carpet thinking how to answer the tough Q as delicately as possible without flat-out saying "no." Don't worry, hon, we totally read between the lines.

We wouldn't be surprised if Foxx, who just fathered a love child with a mystery gal, gets together with Jude Law once a month just to yak about all the babes they lead on, knowing they'll never fully commit. Should George C. be in this players club, too, ya think?

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Sure, it's no shocker Jamie Foxx can act, sing and look damn good while doing it. But can he bite?

We asked the Oscar winner at the Grauman's Chinese Theatre premiere of his new flick, Law Abiding Citizen, if he'd ever consider jumping on the vamp bandwagon and playing one helluva sexy fanger, on TV or in the movies.

I mean, after all, do you all have any idea the impressive number of romantic partners this sometimes-smarmy lover sinks his pearlies into? So what was Jamie's comeback, you ask?

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With flicks like Whip It, Jennifer's Body and Inglourious Basterds hitting the big screen, we're totally noticing a hot new trend of strong, kickass women invading H'wood.

Meanwhile, men are stuck playing dorky, wimpy Judd Apatowy dudes exploring their feelings. What inspired the gender role switcheroo?

"Tides change," Drew Barrymore told us at the premiere of her grrl power, roller derby movie, Whip It. "I think men and women are both equal and sexy and interesting. I never like pooh-poohing on one sex or the other. Let's celebrate both!"

Whip It is Drew's first foray behind the camera, but did anyone tell the romantic-comedy regular she should direct a chick flick instead? She sure has enough experience with the romantic genre.

"This is the project I wanted to direct," insisted Barry-babe. "It was incredibly challenging. You have to be superprepared or you're gonna be in a lot of trouble out there."

Did your godfather, Steven Spielberg, give you any directing tips?

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Is the buzz about the new Sex and the City flick a straight buzz kill for NYC locals? And what's the latest controversial topic Michael Moore might be ready to take on next (hint: It has nothing to do with penises, damn). All this, and your latest Robsten update in today's Truth, Lies & Ted!

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Brad Pitt wears a hat! Also get scoop on more celeb shockers in our daily Big Picture gallery

Megan Fox is so over promoting her new flick, Jennifer's Body, you can just smell her annoyance as she tries to fake her way through interview after interview. As Meg talks with E! News, her almost painful facial expressions and evasive body language just shout get me out of here.

She also asks us to swallow this baby: "I'm so insecure," she deadpans. May we please have a black cherry with that white lie?

We were scared for a sec that Megan's notorious and self-admitted temper would flare up, but don't worry folks, her quotes to Rolling Stone (about how she wouldn't try to off Brian Austin Green, just shoot him in the leg) were all for show. Totally shocking stuff, right?

"I was attempting to be self-deprecating and make myself sound a lot worse than I am," Fox tells Ashlan Gorse in the clip above. "I don't really have a bad temper; it takes a lot to push me over the edge. But I get there every once in a while, but it's not outrageous or crazy."

So what, exactly, does push Megan over the edge? No, it's not Kristen Stewart getting scrappy 'bout her man R.Pattz.

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We're obviously all about investigative reporting here at the A.T. While many journalists out there shy away from the hard-hitting questions, we run to them like Robsten to dark corners!

Just hit up the premiere of Michael Moore's new documentary, Capitalism: A Love Story, and chatted with Jane Adams, star of HBO's hilarious new hit show Hung, with well-endowed man-hooker Thomas Jane. And don't you just love it when some of your fave performers don't disappoint in person? Thankfully, Jane most definitely did not.

Oh, and warning! This vid's full of words like "BLEEP" and "BLEEP," so why not start your Thursday with something a little raunchy, maybe after the kids are gone? Enjoy!

See, we think we have the perf next topic for Moore's next documentary: penis size and the art of seduction. You have to hear what J.A. thought of that:

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"You want me to try to set you up? I'll work on it. How 'bout just a short, you know...fling?"

—Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke, trying to set me up with a date at a recent event in Hollywood

Yes, you read correctly. For real, Catherine—who is the best kind of crackers—was gushing when she and I talked about her being my personal matchmaker. She definitely caught me off guard, but insisted that she would hook me up with something fleeting and flingtastic. Could I be half of the next Robsten? Totally possible, guys.

C-money's got all sorts of Young Hollywood names hidden in her BlackBerry, so if ever I had a chance to go on a date with Selena Gomez, this could be it. I mean, if this is the chick who brought Rob and Kristen together onscreen, how I can go wrong?

But you gotta give it up for Cathy, who never fails to entertain. In fact, she just might be my new Hollywood It girl. Well, maybe. (Seriously, Selena. Hit me up.)

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We know not every single one of you out there is head-over-heels for Robert Pattinson—maybe you're more into the less obvious hotties running around H'wood? Well, we've had our own geek crush on the totally adorable Jason Bateman ever since he starred on canceled cult fave Arrested Development, and we were lucky to make fluttery eyes at the funnyguy at the premiere of his latest flick, Extract.

Jase was a good sport about yakking to us about his famous costars Ben Affleck and Jen Garner, but we couldn't let a dish session go by without asking about the eagerly anticipated big-screen follow-up to his hilarious show. So is Batman as excited as we are about the Arrested Development movie?

"It's gonna be a miniseries first," deadpans J.B.

So how's A.D. gonna get the big-screen treatment? Pregnancies? Deaths? High-speed car chases? Celebrity cameos? Michael Bluth himself fills us in:

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Bradley Cooper is a player for a reason: He's so effing hot! Sure, Renée Zellweger is an Oscar-winning A-list actress, and we're sure she's a really nice girl and all, but aren't you all thinking the same thing we are? He's way too good-looking for her...right?

The two are supposedly still "on," but at last night's All About Steve premiere, you wouldn't know it:

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