Ask the Answer B!tch

Playgirl Magazine, Jesse Grant/Getty Images

What could Levi Johnston possibly gain by posing naked for Playgirl?
—Babs G., via the Answer B!tch inbox

You mean besides money and the eternal high that comes with making Sarah Palin miserable? As the Jews might say, dayenu, that would have been enough.

For women, there are tons of reasons for posing nude: Sharon Stone said she did it for money right after appearing in Total Recall. It sure didn't hurt, given that she later went on to do stuff like Basic Instinct and Casino. We won't even begin to discuss the ongoing successes of The Girls Next Door.

But when it comes to guys who pose in adult mags, there are, generally, only two types: (1) Unknowns who, if the ploy works, graduate to sort-of knowns, and (2) bona fide celebrities who stir up noncontroversies by posing only partly in the buff.

That latter category includes a major country star married to an A-list actress, and a former teen star who has been linked to Megan Fox...

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Doane Gregory/20th Century Fox

Haven't I seen Megan Fox everywhere lately? So then why did her movie bomb?
—Wyayay

You speak of Jennifer's Body. And boy did it bomb.

The movie supposedly—supposedly—cost only $16 million to make, a figure that analysts highly doubt, given the rising-star cast and the fact that the screenwriter is Diablo Cody, who won an Oscar for Juno. But Body grossed only about $6.8 million this weekend.

That, children, is what's known as a bloodbath.

Perhaps you'd like to blame star Megan Fox; if she'd gotten naked, would that have changed anything?

The answer is...

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Elle

Is Megan Fox as crazy as she thinks she is?
—Megan4F

Whelp, she recently told Wonderland magazine, "I constantly struggle with the idea that...I'm a borderline personality, or that I have bouts of mild schizophrenia." She then called her director "endearing" and "like Hitler" in the same interview. Of course distinguishing "crazy" from "crazy hot" requires an actual visit to a shrink. But psychiatrists still had a few insights based on Megan's behavior...

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Jason Merritt/Getty Images; Venturelli/Getty Images; Lester Cohen/Getty Images; Jeff Vespa/Getty Images

Is there any actor in Hollywood who hasn't played a friggin' vampire?
—G.F., Michigan

Between True Blood, Twilight, BBC's Being Human, the upcoming Vampire Diaries and the Anita Blake books coming to the IFC channel, you'd think every actor in Hollywood was shunning the sun and sucking on O-negative. Or at least playing some demonic, blood-craving, vampire-esque critter like Megan Fox is.

Still, there are plenty of actors who have not been infected in unholy ways, and I can give you a list...

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Lisa O'Connor/ZUMAPress.com; Steve Granitz/Getty Images

What's the salary range for non-A-listers in movies, people who've been around for a while but are not household names yet (Kristen Bell, Nia Long, Megan Fox)?
—Olivia

First of all, I have to take issue with your science. Nia Long has a longer string of experience than a pliant young punk like Megan Fox. Fox may have luminous eyes that glow like a sexy Gollum, but in terms of her experience, she's in a lesser category.

I point this out because, most likely, they also fall under different pay categories. And just in case I'm about to lose you, I'm also about to mention Shia LaBeouf. (Everybody scream. Eeeee!)

Does his pay fall closer to the Nia Long category or the Megan Fox column? And what is that kind of pay, anyway? Read on...

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Fame Pictures, Inc

I always see pictures of celebrity children in magazines, and they always seem to be happy. I mean, do these kids just not cry, or do magazines not print bad pictures of the child?
—Becca

Just for you, a photo of Maddox Jolie-Pitt, who pretty much looks like this in every pap shot. Onward, to more of your Burning Q's!

I hear they told Megan Fox to put on 10 pounds for Transformers 2. Can an actress really be toooo skinny?
—Dale, Waukegan, Ill.

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