The Awful Truth

New Moon hits theaters at midnight, which is why we've made this week nonstop Twilight (next week for you haters we'll try and just stop, promise). As Twilight fever hits, I sink my teeth into the top truths and lies about the slurp-a-sexy New Moon cast.

You'll never guess how it ends...

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Head on over to our Truth, Lies, & Ted archive for more dirt.

Doggie Aficionado

Hey, Margo and Charlie Casablanca reporting.

While every stupid human out there is so busy bitch-fighting over who has the better abs—Robert Pattinson or Taylor Lautner—nobody's really seeing why their New Moon costar Kellan Lutz beats them all! Now, not only does Kellan have rock-hard abs, biceps, thighs and just about every other attribute a healthy homo erectus could want, he's also got the best heart, paws down.

Kel-babe, as our stupidly Twi-hard dad would say, doesn't even pay attention to all that gooey AnnaLynne McCord and love crap said about him. Instead, he uses his time in the media to talk about how important it is to rescue chicks like us.

Take Lutz's appearance on Ellen, where he not only talked about how fans hit on him while he was nude...

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"Well, I'm single, so let's see what these girls are bringing to the table!" 

—The delicious and drool-worthy Kellan Lutz when we filled him in on all his Twitter marriage proposals. Seriously, this guy is such a stud!

But is he worth all the hype?

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ABC photo / Randy Holmes

We've got tons of dish for you from the entire New Moon cast and premiere, but let's get to the really good stuff first—Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart.

The two didn't snap pics together on the carpet, and no one could ask the two stars for any personal bites on each other. But we were able to squeeze some cuteness out of Rob.

Producer Bill Bannerman, by the by, told us Kristen was the Julia Child of the cast. So does Rob like her home cookin', too? And how did the two spend their day off in Madrid?

We've got all this, plus piles o' dish from the afterparty, so you'll def want to read on:

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Two of our New Moon faves are Kellan Lutz and Ashley Greene. Lutz, because he's rugged-sexy (more Team Awful's type, sorry Ash) and Greene 'cause she's always such a sweetheart.

With all of the Robsten lovey-dovey stuff, these two babes can get overlooked...which is probably just how they like it.

Seems close friends K & A have just the right amount of fame: They are recognized and can have fun with it, but don't have to stay locked in their hotel rooms.

Let's not forget about Kellan and Ash in our ridiculous New Moon coverage.

Here's what the pair had to say about their star power and inherited fan base, and their witty banter made wonder if there's more there than just being costars?

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"We didn't know what this would become, in a way. We were just actors who fell in love with a script, and within doing that...It's not like a Marvel hero where you know Green Lantern or Captain America, whoever it is, is gonna be famous right off the block. With us, we fell in love with our characters and kind of looked at this as just another job."

—Kellan Lutz refreshingly thanks the Twi-hards for what he's been gifted. After all, since Kel literally has two lines in New Moon, he's gotta be grateful for the avid fan base. Oh, whatever. We could watch buff-boy Lutz read the phonebook for all we care

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Check out some pics of our fave vamps in our New Moon: World Tour Madness gallery!

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Dear Ted:
I love Robsten and can't get enough info, pics and sightings which are few and far between...yet Ashley Greene and Kellan Lutz are constantly seen together and not shy about their "friendship". Is there anything else there or are they really just friends? I think it's interesting nobody cares or gives a second thought to Kellan and Ashley being a couple but we all go crazy over the mere thought of Robsten. Thoughts? Feelings? Scoop?
—Sbb

Dear Vamp lovin' fan:
They knew each other and were friends before all this Twilight hooplah. Ash has told us tons of times she and Kellan are the closest on set. We don't think there's a friends with benefits situation going on...now, anyways.

Dear Ted:
OK, so I've heard enough about Alexander Skarsgård do-ability from you that I finally put True Blood in my Netflix cue. You're right though, Anna Paquin is off the charts. The show's only so-so, however, and one thing is driving me nuts. It really sounds like they are using a motif from The Tudors in the background music, occasionally arranged differently, but sometimes violin-note-for-violin note. Can you find out if they are recycling their music, possibly in hopes to transfer some of JRM's bad boy heat to these otherwise mostly tepid vampires? Or am I just mad as a hatter on this one?
—Wondering Winnie

Dear So Random:
I don't watch The Tudors, but I don't think the TB peeps are that dumb—or cheap. 

Dear Ted:
Is everything as lovey-dovey and perfect in John Krasinski and Emily Blunt's engagement as it seems? They got engaged pretty quickly (together for only 9 months following a pretty nasty breakup on her part) and there have been rumors that she's cheating. What do you think?
—Brit (Bluntski fan)

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If you're an actor in T-town, chances are you'd do anything to nab a role on True Blood or in the Twilight franchise. Not just cause you become an insta-celeb overnight, but all your costars are friggin' hot and usually lucky in love! Check out our Vamp Lovers Gallery if you don't believe how sex charmed these fanged hits are. 

As successful as vamp shows are when it comes to picking up a lover, there's actually one par-tick pair who can't give full credit to their series for bringing them together. In fact, they've known each other way longer than fans realize. Can ya guess who it is?

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Jemal Countess/Getty Images for IMG

Kellan Lutz was spotted at the HBO Luxury Lounge at the Four Seasons Hotel Saturday. Lutz, who was sporting his Eclipse darker 'do (we so prefer him blond, you?), picked up a box of Camacho cigars, presumably for the rest of the Twilight boys.

While the ladies appear to be battling with quitting cigarettes (remember that was why Nikki Reed supposedly wasn't hanging with the Twilight girls since she's avidly "trying to quit"), the fellas up north seem to be enjoying the stogies. Kell said inhaling them on set is "our weekend thing." Yum, the thought of K.L. and Robert Pattinson power-puffin' on them is hot, no?

While picking up some swag Kellan ran into a familiar face...

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Stephen Moyer hanging out in supergood spirits at the HBO Emmys afterparty, even though True Blood got totally snubbed nomination-wise.

Stephen looked absolutely divine in a fitted black tux, with his Bill Compton-esque hair a smidge lighter than usual. But where was Anna Paquin? His on- and offscreen lovah was noticeably absent from the show, and party, but don't worry—there is no trouble in human-vampire paradise.

When asked where Anna was, S.M. responded in his delicious British accent, "Oh, she just had a prior engagement." Must not have had anything to do with her real engagement to Moyer, but either way glad this couple can hang apart.

Just because HBO is True Blood territory doesn't mean some Twilighters didn't show up...

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Todd Williamson/Getty Images, Dave M. Benett/Getty Images

With all the horny hotties running amok on True Blood, Twilight and the Vampire Diaries, there are too many (mostly) cute couples coming and going in the vamp universe nowadays—who can possibly keep them all straight, as it were?

Check out Awful's photographic roundup of all the superfine couples connected to today's popular vampire shows and flicks, and our personal take on whether they've got the goods to make their love immortal, vamp-style. (Too bad Buffy's not still on the air, or we'd include a happily pregnant Sarah Michelle Gellar and her longtime hubby, Freddie Prinze Jr., in our gallery, too.)

One thing irks us, though: Where the ef are our homo fangers? Is Terry Tush-Trade the only switch-hitter on a vamp show? We know for a fact there are more of you out there—come out of the friggin' coffin already!

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Sink your teeth into the Vamp Lovers gallery, people.

Ryan Miller/Getty Images; AP Photo/Chris Polk

First up, is AnnaLynne McCord having dumper's remorse? Kellan Lutz recently flew down to Las Vegas to spend the weekend with Miss McCord, sparking rumors that the on-off couple is back on.  

"He has been really trying hard to win her back," says a close friend of the kinda-couple. "He's been stepping it up."

After making a major dating faux pas by neglecting to get AnnaLynne a B-day gift, Kellan tried to make it up to her by sending chocolate-covered strawberries and sparkling cider to her New York hotel room a few weeks ago.

So is AnnaLynne falling back into his ripped arms?

"She's a little hesitant but very flattered by how hard he is working to win her back," dishes our source. "They're young and seem to be crazy about each other, but it's hard to keep a relationship in Hollywood. I'm not sure if they are officially back together, but he is definitely trying."

Good thing she didn't settle for less with that Kellan clone last week. The real deal is so much better.

Now onto Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart…is K.Stew prepping to be Mrs. R.Pattz?

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