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First, she admits to cutting herself, now she's making criminals of meat-eaters. Make no mistake, Natalie Portman is all grown up and not some shrinking violet.

Penning what amounts to a Harvard-caliber book report for the Huffington Post, the actress and animal rights activist holds forth on her devotion to veganism and her opinion that those who choose to feast on flesh without regard for the moral implications might as well change their name to Roman Polanski.

The 28-year-old—with whose glowing self veganism clearly agrees—starts off harmlessly enough, crediting Jonathan Safran Foer's Eating Animals with her transition from 20 years of vegetarianism to eschewing all animal byproducts.

"I've always been shy about being critical of others' choices because I hate when people do that to me," she writes. "I'm often interrogated about being vegetarian (e.g., 'What if you find out that carrots feel pain, too? Then what'll you eat?').

"I've also been afraid to feel as if I know better than someone else—a historically dangerous stance (I'm often reminded that 'Hitler was a vegetarian, too, you know.') But this book reminded me that some things are just wrong."

That's where the criminalization of carnivores comes in.

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Turns out there is still room in the mashed-veggies market for Jessica Seinfeld.

A judge on Thursday threw out a lawsuit brought by the author of a for-kids cookbook who accused Jerry's wife of ripping off her handy-dandy ideas for getting young ones to eat their vegetables and other oft-rejected healthy stuff.

Saying that the two books, Jessica's Deceptively Delicious: Secrets to Getting Your Kids Eating Good Food and plaintiff Missy Chase Lapine's The Sneaky Chef: Simple Strategies for Hiding Healthy Foods in Kids' Favorite Meals, are "very different," U.S. District Court Judge Laura Swain ruled that Lapine had neither a trademark nor copyright-infringement case against the Seinfelds.

Most notably, Jessica Seinfeld's book is "bright and cheerful, full of different colors and various patterns," while Lapine's is "a dry, rather text-heavy work."

Swain opted not to decide whether Jerry Seinfeld is reliably hilarious or actually malicious, saying Lapine's defamation complaint against the comedian over jokes he made about her on Late Show With David Letterman is a matter for a state court to decide.

Despite that bit of uncertainty, all of the above sounds pretty appetizing to the Seinfelds so far.

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Move over, Atkins. Step aside, Master Cleanse. We are proud to present the Michael Jackson diet.

Just when you thought you knew everything there was to know about the months leading up to the King of Pop's death, out pops former Jackson nutritionist Cherilyn Lee—who, luckily for us, never met a camera she didn't like—to shed some light on the question that's really plaguing the minds of the music legend's fans: Forget the toxicology report. Forget the multiple home raids. What, oh what, did M.J. like to eat?

Take it away, Lee.

"He loved trail mix," she told E! News. "And once a month he had to have fried chicken."

The odd smattering of snack and junk food aside, Lee said Jackson generally subsisted on what was more or less a liquid, juice-based diet. Or at least he did up until she parted ways with the singer in April, at which point he apparently moved on to more substantial fare.

Like granola.

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It's GOOP day!

Typically Gwyneth Paltrow likes to use her weekly lifestyle newsletter for evil. Like bizarre name-dropping (remember William Joel?) or meaningful quote fails ("A long-term relationship between two people is an ever evolving organism. Some stay the course, some fall, all stumble.") Or to inform us about her bowel movements.

But this week, Gwynnie treats us to our first video GOOP and she actually does some good (and you heard right, GOOP TV is finally here. Rejoice?)...

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There's something fishy going on at one of London's most swanky celeb restaurants: The stars are aligning to boycott until an endangered fish is removed from its sushi menu.

Elle Macpherson, Sienna Miller, Alicia Silverstone, Charlize Theron, Sting and Trudie Styler, Ted Danson, Woody Harrelson and Stephen Fry are among the 31 famous folks who have signed a petition vowing not to patronize Nobu London until it stops serving the near-extinct bluefin tuna.

According to the petition, the stars say they can no longer "dine with a clear conscience" at the establishment.

"As customers and fans of Nobu we strongly feel that bluefin tuna must be completely removed from your menu due to its perilous position as an extremely endangered animal," the statement reads.

"Nobu is a restaurant we all love, a world leader in sushi with a fantastic reputation and enormous influence. If Nobu took a definitive stand on this issue it could make a critical difference."

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Who wouldn't want to get a taste of Daniel Craig?

Lucky ladies in the U.K. will have the opportunity to lick his well-chiseled abs freely. Del Monte's Superfruit Smoothies is releasing limited-edition lollies—that's Popsicles to us—of the Bond star's, ahem, delicious torso and head. The purple frozen treats are blueberry, pomegranate and cranberry flavored, and will only be available this week during Britain's National Ice Cream Week. (Sidenote: U.S. National Ice Cream Month is in July—anyone for a Robert Pattinson flavored treat?)

The fruit company conducted a poll asking women who they'd like to see melting from a wooden stick, and 41-year-old Craig was their man.

"Daniel Craig topped our poll of Britain's coolest celebrities and, thanks to our Del Monte lolly replica, he is officially immortalized as super smooth and licensed to chill," spokesman Matt O'Connor said in a statement.

A few other stars have been showing off their sweet tooths lately...

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It's probably safe to say that Sting's new message in a bottle will age slightly better than his last.

The tantric one is following in the esteemed footsteps of Paul Newman, Francis Ford Coppola and, uh, Madonna, announcing that he has produced 30,000 bottles of red wine from his Tuscan estate that will go on sale in the U.S. and U.K. in September.

The artist formerly known as Gordon Sumner said he will market two types of red to the masses: Chianti DOC and a Tuscan varietal based on the Sangiovese grape. The first wave of bottles will come from Sting's 2007 vintage.

Let the whine jokes begin continue.

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