The Awful Truth

Is there a shot in hell our dear Toothy Tile could be really scared straight, as opposed to just scared into acting that way?

Our fave Current TV segment "That's Gay" written and performed by Bryan Safi (which is still way funnier than Brüno ever hoped to be) blasts the futile hobby some people have to convert gay men back to being straight.

Are people just bitter that the supercute, funny and talented Neil Patrick Harris is openly playing for Team Homo? Deal with it, folks! He's ours!

We certainly hope of all people, Toothy's watching this latest installment...

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We know Miss Cali is an utter hypocrite, but did she learn her contradictory behavior from Donald Trump, who totally picks and chooses how he gives his second chances? Why does Carrie Prejean get to keep her tiara on top of her swelled ego while Miss Nevada 2007, Katie Rees, was stripped of her title back in 2006?

Both beauty princesses were seen in all sorts of seminudity, so what's the big diff? Was it because Miss Nevada was kissing a girl in one of the leaked photos?

Sure, a bimbo-lovin' dude like the Donald, whose own ethics are so questionable it's laughable he'd be considered a moral authority figure, would sure love that type of sultry behavior—but not from one of his precious Miss USA gals. God forbid any lesbianism taint his perfectly primped role models, right?

What's Trump's take on the whole gay marriage debate, anyway?

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In an interview with Ebony Magazine, Jada Pinkett Smith says she really doesn't care about rumors that float around regarding her fam.

"You want people to talk about you, because once they stop talking about you, that's when you're really in trouble!"

True, but does she draw the line when it comes to her sexuality?

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Hellmuth Dominguez, PacificCoastNews.com

Lance Bass and his new boy-toy, model Gustavo Marzolla, having one helluva posh dinner date at Asia de Cuba at the Mondrian Hotel. The pretty pair canoodled all through the meal—googly eyes, footsies, ya know, the works. Lancy and his lad then headed over to Skybar for some liquid desert, drinking tropical concoctions at the SKYY Infusions Pineapple launch party.

One dude flying solo from all his male compadres (for once) was...

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We remember the days when Oscar-nom morning would come and Kevin Spacey would more than likely be a part of it. Now? We caught up with the former two-time Oscar winner slinking around Sundance, promoting his new indie flick, Shrink, instead of celebrating a nom with friends, fam and fellas.

Hey, Kev, there coulda been a nice role for ya somewhere in Milk, we’re sure, if only you went after that terribly chic and sorta male-dominated subject material. But, like, we really did ask this question. For real: What do you  think about all these gay-friendly flicks finally getting noticed? Answer might surprise more than a few:

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Ellen DeGeneres, as everybody knows, isn't the most combative broad around (probably why she has so many damn fans). But here's some good news, Ellen: You have yet more famous help fighting the gay-marriage battle. Our Miami snoop, Martin Haro, spoke with Project Runway’s fabulously together Christian Siriano at the Victoria’s Secret show over the weekend. Christian was with his BF, whom he announced he wants to marry. Pretty young for such a big step, sweetheart, but hell, such fab news! Listen to C.S. on all things fashionable and fierce:

On Heidi Klum and the V.S. show:
"Tranny Klum is fabulous. It's amazing. It's crazy here. There's so many people. It's hot, my hair's wilted, but I love it here. The Fontainebleau's gorgeous."

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AP Photo/ Matt Sayles

“Harvey’s central message was: Gay people must come out. All surveys, all studies show that those people who finally become aware that they have gay people in their families or as their coworkers or neighbors are less likely to take away our rights.”

—Gay rights activist Cleve Jones—played by Emile Hirsch in Milk—about the first step in gaining equality. Try convincing all of H'wood of that

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"They like gay marriage in England. It's a progressive country."

—Brit-born Gavin Rossdale, hubby to gay icon Gwen Stefani, talking up how all this Prop 8 hate would go over across the pond. Oh, really?

Jay L. Clendenin/Lara Porzak Photography via GettyImages

What I should really be peeved about is that hideous Narciso Rodriguez victory dress Michelle Obama chose to wear next to her fabulously historic and much needed newly elected husband, Barack.

What was she thinking? Doesn't she have any fashion-conscious girlfriends, any gay buds who could have advised her better?

Maybe they were all otherwise engaged trying to help defeat Prop 8, which makes gay marriage illegal in California? Very happy for the Obamas, truly I am. Hard to be ecstatic, though, right now.

Do you have any idea how demoralizing it feels to reside in a state where residents have voted to improve the rights of farm animals but lessen those of gay men and women? Say baaahh if you love Jesus!

And no, I have no intention of moving; the fight has only begun. Get ready for it, everybody. This will change. Just ask Ellen and Portia—and more than a few legal types—if you don't believe me.

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Say it ain’t so. Could Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson’s “special” relaysh already be on the fritz? It’s only a matter of time before L.L. retreats back and finds comfort in her fave male body part. ‘Course, we’ve been warning this one since that gal went all lesbyterian, anyway, but makes us wonder...

AP Photo/Reed Saxon

There's a reason MTV doesn't play music videos anymore—they're being played everywhere else. Britney's set to release her "Womanizer" vid on 20/20, which just shows ya that no so-called news outlet is too proud to shy away from the stuff that really sells: celebs.

Kanye West also stuck it to MTV by showing up on Ellen this morning to premiere his vid for "Love Lockdown." Strange place for a music debut, on daytime TV, but guess Kan has a thing for Mrs. de Rossi. "I wanted to say you have really great style," fawned Kanye to El-hon. Pointing to her dark blue sweater, he complimented, "I would completely wear this!" Lesbian chic, newest fashion trend, trust.

Gotta say, it's really refreshing to see a tough rapper so at home with the gay stuff, but is it real or an act, sorta like when Eminem did a duet with Elton John at the Grammys back in 2001? We think West actually means it, as opposed to Em just using it to score some brownie points with the angry gay crowds. Kan's got a lot of anger issues, but he's sure kinder to the homo demo than he is to the paparazzi.

Is this forward 'tude gonna lose the hipster-dressing K.W. some "street cred"? Like rappers aren't gay, please, but you get the point. Or does this rainbow effort of Kanye's ultimately make the dude more likeable in the long run, turning him into the rap community's only fagola icon à la Cher, Madonna or even Ellen?

Pretty sad if his über-success suffers any simply cause of his frequent associations with the homo boys 'n' girls. Could happen, especially when a person like Sarah Palin can make an entire career out of denouncing the same.

—With additional sass by Becky Bain

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This is when I am so tempted to agree with my colleagues like Perez Hilton and Michael Musto, who are all about outing obviously gay stars—or at least their very public prancing ‘round. What makes me possibly consider lamenting not subscribing to such journalistic tactics would be the recent People press release regarding Clay Aiken proclaiming, yes, he’s gay.

Let’s see, that’s about as newsworthy as when Nathan Lane finally came out, or when Ellen DeGeneres or Anne Heche or Liberace did, oh wait, that last one’s still in the closet (posthumously, I suppose), and the one right before went right back in, so whatever.

Point is, even though, yes, technically speaking, I don’t believe in outing, and it’s the star’s prerogative to disclose his or her homosexuality, not mine, we’re not stupid. And it’s really insulting to continue to be treated as such—which is what folks are doing when they say they’re dating members of the opposite sex, when they’re privately diddling ones of their own. And then to get some kind of royal welcoming for doing something most folks already knew about all along? It’s disingenuous at best, unethical at worst. Who’s next, Kevin...?

Oh wait, I don’t out people, so never mind.