Movie Reviews

Sony Pictures

Review in a Hurry:  A lonely lad (Alex Etel), starved for fun and scared of the water, befriends a Loch Ness Monster-esque creature. Couldn't he just take swimming lessons instead? Horse trots out the expected complications and comic situations, but some CGI wizardry and a strong cast make this an entertaining-enough diversion for kiddies on Christmas break.

The Bigger Picture:  Though based on the children's fantasy book by Dick King-Smith, this adaptation feels a bit like warmed-over Spielberg: a combo of E.T., Jurassic Park, and Jaws in which a fatherless boy bonds with a displaced creature; said creature is huge and prehistoric, scaring the locals; and guys on a too-small boat try to hunt it down. Unfortunately, there's no bloodshed—that would be cool.

Angus lives at a loch-side Scottish estate with his older sis (Priyanka Xi) and housekeeper mom (Emily Watson), and he counts the months until Dad's return from his WWII tour of duty. One day, while combing the tides for shells, the kid finds a magical-looking egg, which hatches a mythical water horse.

Angus tries to keep the sea serpent—slickly rendered by Weta Digital—a secret from his stern ma and the British soldiers stationed at their home; he hides it in a barrel, a bathtub, a toilet, etc. But a meddlesome bulldog sniffs out the critter, and much wackiness ensues, including the predictable chaos at a fancy-schmancy dinner party.

The voracious creature starts growing at an astonishing rate, so Angus—with the help of their new handyman, Lewis Mowbray (Ben Chaplin)—has to release his Nessie into the loch. (Actually, its name is Crusoe.) But can the boy still protect his beloved beastie when the locals are claiming Crusoe is a "monster" and the British militia has mistaken him for a Nazi sub?

His face splashed with freckles and eyes full of yearning, Etel (priceless in Millions) charms as the troubled tyke, though it'd be nice if his friendship with Crusoe were more enchanting—or even captivating. Family scenes fare better, thanks to the always amazing Watson. Wee ones will enjoy the chases and other silly stuff, as well as Angus' wild ride on Crusoe's back, even if the sequence suffers from an overly digitized look.

Horse hits its stride in the home stretch, with darker, scarier set pieces, and even if the flick doesn't finish a winner, it still makes a so-so showing.

The 180—a Second Opinion:  Why do filmmakers feel the need to impose a present-day framework on what's essentially a period piece? Here we have elderly Angus (Brian Cox) sharing this flashback tale with some annoying, wide-eyed tourists. Hey, tell us a story, kindly old stranger in the pub! These scenes are intrusive, unnecessary and in one case—with a shock cut to Cox cackling at a memory—downright creepy!