Publicity Stunt Report Cards: Halle Bending Over and Decepticons in MySpace

Tue., Apr. 10, 2007 11:04 AM PDT by Caroline Kepnes

Man, it feels like a really long time since I put out some report cards. So, let's go back to Hollywood High School and rate recent, shameless publicity ploys. Rulers out!

Lisa O?Connor/ZUMAPress.com

Halle Berry Kisses the Walk of Fame: A-

Everyone was talking about Halle Berry's body last week, and it's not because she shot a sex tape or went shopping sans panties. It is, of course, because she bent over and kissed her new star on Hollywood Boulevard's Walk of Fame. Yes, the whole Star Walk thing stinks of phony baloney. Halle's been a star—and an Oscar winner—for some time, so why now? Because of her movie Perfect Stranger. Coincidence? Hell no! Wink, wink. Anyway, I called Halle on her little kiss, just to see how she would play it. "It was spontaneous," she told this Reel Girl, not gesticulating wildly in a way that might suggest lying. "My friends were like, 'Ewww, don't you know homeless people and crackheads pee on that street?' But it was just a moment." Yes, use of the word 'crackhead' did bump up her grade a bit.

Hasbro

Transformers on MySpace: D+

Maybe it's because the trailer of this Michael Bay crash-boom-chuckle action flick doesn't set my heart racing the way Bruce Willis' one-liners in the Live Free or Die Hard trailer do, but let me get to the point already. Paramount cordially invited their mass mailing list to "choose your side: Are you an Autobot or a Decepticon?" at the Transformers Myspace page. The movie has 245,458 friends. I am not one of them. Best part: Transformers' number two friend is one Michael Bay. But get this, his page is private. Private! Ha! Come on Michael, make up your mind. There' no privacy in publicity. Well, at least not on MySpace anyway.

George Pimentel/WireImage.com

Robert Rodriguez Hearts Rose McGowan Rumors: C

Here's what bums me most about rumors that the married director fell hard for his go-go-dancing starlet. Entertainment Weekly and Premiere both ran lengthy features on the film. As in they sent writers to the set. There is not a single mention of said rumor in the EW article; the Premiere story touches it, barely—like pokes it with a pinkie. Granted, this is sensitive subject matter because Rodriguez has a big family. But they knew this was going to come out. And it would have been way less tacky to work up some statement about it when the "dignified" press were nearby rather than whisper to Page Six seconds before the release date.