Casablanca, the 1942 Kleenex classic in which Humphrey Bogart gives Ingrid Bergman the world's coolest-sounding brush-off speech, was named the most romantic Hollywood movie of the 20th century, per the industrious list makers at the American Film Institute.

The AFI, which previously has apprised us of the 100 best thrillers, the 100 best comedies and the flat-out 100 best American films of all time, was back at it Tuesday, with the CBS TV-special, 100 Years...100 Passions, outlining the 100 best love stories.

AFI's top 10 was rounded out by, respectively: Gone with the Wind; West Side Story; 1953's Roman Holiday; An Affair to Remember; The Way We Were; Doctor Zhivago; It's a Wonderful Life; Love Story; City Lights.

That Bogie and Bergman don't end up together at the end of Casablanca, seemingly taking some of the love out of their "love" story, hardly matters to the AFI. In fact, eight of the top 10 flicks feature star-crossed types who don't end up together on account of stuff like death (Love Story), death by gang warfare (West Side Story) and Clark Gable getting sick of taking Vivien Leigh's crap (Gone with the Wind).

(The two top 10ers that do have happy, lovey-dovey endings? An Affair to Remember and It's a Wonderful Life.)

Like past AFI lists, the flicks to make the cut heavily favor pre-1990 tearjerkers (even 1997's Titanic, the most successful romantic drama in the history of blinkin' romantic dramas, could do no better than 37th). Only 27 of the top 100, in fact, were produced post-1970. As such, the films' lovers are overwhelmingly white, straight and monied.

Dapper gentleman Cary Grant and headstrong lady Katharine Hepburn, onscreen lovers themselves in The Philadelphia Story and Bringing Up Baby, placed the most films on the list, with six apiece. (Hepburn, though, is not the romantic focus of each of hers--notably, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner, 58th, which is about the interracial courting of Sidney Poitier and Katharine Houghton.)

Others placing multiple films on the list: Bogart and Audrey Hepburn, with five each. (Bogart's not the romantic lead in all of his films, either. While he appears in Dark Victory, 32nd, he's merely Bette Davis' horse trainer--and we don't mean that in any double entendre kind of way.)

Being an iconic sex symbol did not ensure placement for one of your films. Notable top 100 MIAs: Marilyn Monroe, Burt Reynolds, Paul Newman, Steve McQueen and James Dean.

William Wyler (Roman Holiday, et al.) and George Cukor (The Philadelphia Story, et al.) were the most romantic directors, each with four films on the list. (You were expecting Oliver Stone, perhaps?)

And the factoids just keep on coming: AFI counted and found that its 100 flicks featured approximately 187 lovers' quarrels and 260 kissing scenes.

We counted, too, and found that the list featured just one illicit-use-of-butter scene, courtesy Last Tango in Paris (48th).

Now, if Marlon Brando's anonymous, Land O' Lakes-enhanced tryst with a French chick who ends up offing him doesn't strike you as date-movie material, the AFI doesn't care. Per its judging panel of actors, directors, scribes, critics, historians and others, the ground rules were that a film had to be in English and feature "a romantic bond between two or more characters."

In other words, no one said the thing had to be sweet.

Hence, some curious choices to make the cut: the dead-eyed Double Indemnity (84th); the cradle-robbing Manhattan (66th); and the hooker-rific Pretty Woman (21st).

At least the AFI didn't discriminate against animals--non-humans bat their misty eyes in the animated Lady and the Tramp (96th) and the interspecial King Kong (24th).

Candice Bergen hosted Tuesday's TV special, which featured the likes of Hugh Jackman, Ali MacGraw and Rob Reiner adding their two cents.

Complete list of AFI's greatest love stories.