Blind Vice: No Taming This Royally Horny Slut!

Lord Tripp Unzipped can’t make the marriage work—despite the world’s romantics rooting for him

By Ted Casablanca Jul 08, 2011 2:00 PMTags
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There's something about living a fairy-tale life that just dares you to screw it up—or so one would think watching Lord Tripp Unzipped and all his dalliances. Despite having many high-profile affairs, Tripp has never seemed able to find the right looker to settle down with, that is, until he met the gorgeous Lady Unzipped.

And my, how the world ate it up, watching Lord and his pretty partner in marriage settle down—with lots and lots of future poshly positioned heirs to look forward to.

Right?

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No. Quite wrong, in fact. The only thing that's really a stunner here is that Tripp's spouse went along with the matrimonial plan—even though this now incredibly rich partner (like many an Unzipped-friendly source) knows full well that not only does Lord U fool around, he's not exactly picky about who he gets into bed with, male or female.

And anybody who's anybody within this royal set is taking bets on (a) how long it'll be before Unzipped eventually chooses a less than discreet conquest romance, (b) when that will get out to the press and (c) just when (not if, but, when) is Lady Unzipped going to run screaming to anybody—and any publisher—who will listen about what a damn cheating, sloppy schmuck this Unzipped dude really is.

Impressive title be damned.

It Ain't: Elton John, Prince Edward, Sean Connery