Week in Review: Kate Rips Jon a New One, Letterman Apologizes, Miley Quits Twitter
Quantrell Colbert/BRAVO; CBS; Kevin Mazur/Getty Images; Barry Talesnick/Globe Photos/ZUMAPRESS.com; Jean Baptiste Lacroix/Getty Images
Doesn't it seem as if, just a few weeks ago, Jon and Kate Gosselin were slowly edging off the radar...
Maybe they sensed they were losing their tabloid stamina and couldn't deal, because the duo are back with a vengeance, trading barbs, filing court docs, buying birthday cake...
With stars like these, who needs average acquaintances?
1. Because She Said So: Kate Gosselin's busy taping Jay Leno Show sketches and gabbing with Meredith Vieira, while Jon got a verbal lashing from Nancy Grace , is being sued for alimony and has been accused of draining their bank account and shoving the money who-knows-where. Then Kate allowed Jon to hang out for longer than two hours on the occasion of their twins' birthday. Um, Jon? If you want to be a man, you know you need a certain body part (or two) to make that happen, right?
2. My Bad: David Letterman, who has spun his latest conundrum into comedic gold, offered a heartfelt apology to his scorned wife, Regina, to The Late Show staff for unwittingly throwing them into a media frenzy, and, once again, to Sarah Palin. (Did we mention the comedic gold?) Stephanie Birkitt, whose old diary and correspondence with Dave are reportedly at the heart of alleged extortionist Robert Halderman's plot, is currently on paid leave. So did anyone watch Conan last week? Anyone...?
3. Tragedy: A suspect has been charged with voluntary manslaughter in the beating death of Real Housewives of Atlanta star Kandi Burruss' fiancé, Ashley "A.J." Jewell. "My heart is heavy with grief," Burruss said.
4. No More Party in the URL: Emotive Internet presence Miley Cyrus closed her Twitter account, supposedly because boyfriend Liam Hemsworth doesn't tweet and he's got a "good reason" for not wanting his lady to, either. Her absence has left a gaping hole in the twitterverse as we and John Mayer knew it. If Frances Bean Cobain has half the Twitter stamina her mom has, she's a good candidate to fill the void.
Todd Williamson/Gety images
5. Addition, Subtraction & Multiplication: Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush are back together...Khloé's too busy for a honeymoon right now...Chris Noth is engaged...Heidi Klum's ready to take Seal Samuel's name...Katy Perry and Russell Brand are out and about...Audrina Patridge is newly single...Christina Milian and The-Dream are expecting...Kourtney Kardashian's having a boy...Ma and Pa Duggar of 18 Kids and Counting are first-time grandparents.
6. Law & Disorder: Mel Gibson's DUI charge was expunged...The Jewish officer who took one for the tribe is off the hook too...Beleaguered Michael Jackson physician Conrad Murray skipped a child-support hearing, is wanted by police...Soulja Boy got busted...A paparazzo pissed off Sean Penn and allegedly got pounded...Method Man's not one for taxes...The taxman and the bank cameth for Nicolas Cage...Randy Quaid's wife was sued by the officer who arrested their weird asses...Real Housewives of New Jersey's Danielle Staubs was sued by her first ex-hubby...Dr. Phil was sued for supposedly being a bad, bad therapist...A filmmaker claims Chris Rock's in a hairy situation...Roman Polanski's stuck in jail...Britney ex Adnan Ghalib is cutting a deal on charges of dinging a process server with his car.
Mike Guastella/Getty Images
7. Socialized Medicine: Nicole Richie suffered minor injuries in a car accident yet insisted on not being taken to the hospital by ambulance...Elizabeth Taylor is recovering from heart surgery and twittering like a woman half her age...Swine flu shut down the Backstreet Boys and Bones...Adam Yauch digs Eastern medicine.
8. Skin Lit 101: Marge Simpson on the cover of Playboy and (on the Internet), Levi Johnston in Playgirl, both equally hilarious ideas.
9. As seen on TV: Cougartown and Modern Family got picked up, while Southland was killed in the line of duty...South Park premiered, pissing upon the graves of more than a few dead celebs in the process...Dancing With the Stars lost two this week...The Gosselins are getting their own Law & Order plot...The video for Death Cab for Cutie's New Moon single, "Meet Me on the Equinox," premiered...MTV's going with its DJ AM-helmed addiction special...Harry Connick Jr. isn't down with an Australian TV show's use of blackface...Michael Vick's getting his own reality show on BET...Simon Cowell's peddling cologne...Ellen Page is gonna write and produce for HBO. Oh, and Watch With Kristin's namesake TV diva is back from maternity leave and raring to dish!!
10. And the Rest: Obama won the Nobel Prize, Hollywood rejoiced...Matt & Ben are related!...There's an unauthorized Rob Pattinson documentary out there...Lindsay Lohan's fashion sense is being raked over the coals...Happy birthday, Gwen Stefani...Madonna made an unremarkable cameo on Saturday Night Live...Even if you're staying in, go party crashing with Cristina (pajamas allowed)!
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There's nothing like poring over pictures of your nearest and dearest—or Hollywood's hottest and weirdest. Check out the latter in our Big Picture gallery.
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