Even if you don't want to admit it, we know you're just dying to hear more about the madness that will be Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt's real round of nuptials this weekend.
Read on for a luscious bouquet of wedding details, including MTV's involvement, what other Hills stars made the guest list and, oh yeah, scoop on the dress, the tux, the church, and more...brought to you exclusively by your friends at E! News.
(Peruse in peace. We won't tell anyone you were here.)
The Jewels: Heidi will be wearing jewels on loan from Neil Lane. We're told they'll worth close to $1 million total! She will get fitted for the jewels Friday before their wedding rehearsal dinner at Cut.
The Dress: Heidi's custom-made dress from Monique Lhuillier costs $19,000.
The Guys: Spencer and his two (nonceleb) groomsmen are being fitted for tuxes Wednesday.
Bridesmaids: Heidi's sister, Holly Montag, will be maid of honor, with Stephanie Pratt the lone bridesmaid.
Guests: Just over 200 people are on guest list. Among the confirmed notables are singer Michael Bublé, Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson-Wentz, Khloe Kardashian, Perez Hilton, music producers David Foster and Cathy Dennis (Heidi's producer, who also did Katy Perry's "I Kissed a Girl"). Heidi's entire family, including her mother, Darlene Egelhoff, who had previously shared her disapproval of the union, will be in attendance.
The Hills peeps: Brody Jenner plans on going, and MTV asked that bromancer Frankie Delgado attend. Lauren Conrad has already said she's not likely to appear.
The Party: The wedding party is staying at the Regent Beverly Wilshire Hotel in Beverly Hills, the site of Friday's wedding rehearsal dinner and the wedding reception. The reception will be "intimate." "Spencer and Heidi were going to have a reception on a rooftop location, but now they are asking guests to meet them at the sidebar at Cut after wedding ceremony," an insider tells E! News. "They are not having a formal reception. Spencer just decided...He wanted it to be more intimate. He didn't want a superhuge reception."
The Church: The pastor who will officiate the 4 p.m. wedding at Westminster Presbyterian Church in Pasadena is the same one who is doing premarital counseling sessions, the Rev. Dr. Twining F. Campbell. Speidi calls him "Dr. Twine."
Honeymoon: The newlyweds won't be leaving immediately, and there are "still a few destinations up in the air," says a wedding insider. "At first, they thought Four Seasons in Maui. But now they are looking at Tahiti, Fiji, possibly Europe."
Still sad you weren't invited?