ABC/KELSEY MCNEALDancing With the Stars is down to eight, and it's not getting any easier.
Last week, David Alan Grier got stuck with the short end of the voting stick, while the heavier footed Lawrence Taylor survived to groove another day. Gilles Marini wowed with a throbbing paso doble, and Steve-O limped into the next round with a last-place score but plenty of fans.
Of course, those results are old news.
This week the celebs were tasked to master the sexy syncopation of the rumba or the jaunty steps of the jive—a task that proved not so simple for some, while others took their best stabs at perfection...
Ty Murray: A fast-moving Ty is our favorite kind of cowboy, but his high-stepping jive—which included a monster flub in the middle—largely disappointed. Jewel's steer-wrangling hubby manfully persevered, but he looked two steps behind Chelsie Hightower the rest of the way. "The line-dancing was good," Bruno Tonioli said of the country-inspired routine, but "then the jive started." "You're still so cute, Ty," offered Carrie Ann Inaba, perhaps for the last time.
Score: 18. Enough to get him the boot?
Shawn Johnson: The 17-year-old's opening solo looked more like a gymnastics floor routine than a come-hither wag of the hips, but plenty of rumba romance ensued once Mark Ballas joined in. There were a few seconds of closeness where you could practically hear Shawn thinking, OK, close enough, but the judges appreciated that the duo performed a rumba rather than a simulated makeout session. "I think you got this just right," Len Goodman said appreciatively.
Score: 26. Still in a scoring rut.
Lawrence Taylor: The retired linebacker didn't have the bounce that would have made for a truly great jive, but the struggling Super Bowl winner looked way smooth tonight—as if the neighborhood kingpin had stepped up for an impromptu trot around the floor while grooving at the local speakeasy. Carrie Ann lauded the return of L.T.'s groove, and Bruno noticed that he never lost time. Len liked Edyta Sliwinska's inclusion of lots of basic jive steps.
Score: 22. We were expecting higher, what with all the high praise.
Melissa Rycroft: "It was clean, it was precise…it could be a bit more earthy." Len put it exactly right—Melissa swayed to the music with ease, and her lines were spot on. But her rumba still had a posey quality, as if she was more focused on nailing every step than on making ballroom love to her partner, Tony Dovolani. Carrie Ann "believed every minute of the passion," however.
Score: 27. She lost a few points for being too perfect.
Lil' Kim: Derek Hough tends to outjive his partners—but Lil' Kim proved a force to be reckoned with in this high-energy, prison (ahem)-themed routine set to, of course, "Jailhouse Rock." We knew Len was going to criticize the lack of formal jive steps, but Kim ended up with a kiss from Bruno and a standing O from Carrie Ann.
Score: 28. Quite the discrepancy—10s from Carrie Ann and Bruno and an 8 from Len.
Steve-O: Score another one for Steve-O's soft side! "How am I supposed to be in love with you if you keep farting all the time?" was the question Lacey Schwimmer had for the Jackass star, who looked to be in danger of cracking up when their rumba first began. But he held it together and turned in his best dance of the competition. "A long way from last week," Carrie Ann, mesmerized by Steve-O's commitment and honesty, said. But Len said grumpily, "You can't confuse movement with dancing."
Score: 16. This included his first-ever 7, from Carrie Ann, while Len offered up a 4. (Apparently we've been fooled by what Bruno called "the charm of a confused puppy.")
Gilles Marini: So, guess who does have enough bounce to make a truly great jive? The leather he and Cheryl Burke were wearing seemed a little out of place with those cute little jive steps, but...Yeah, as if it made a difference. Thanks to the weird version of Fall Out Boy's "Dance Dance" that served as accompaniment, their dance was ultrafast, and that made it look, as Len said, "a little bit frantic." Hey, we like frantic.
Score: 26. His lowest since week one's 24.
Chuck Wicks: Julianne Hough's rumba choreography made us think for a second that we'd stumbled upon a stolen boudoir moment, but that didn't help the fact that there's something missing from Chuck's overall package. They make a delightful-looking couple, but Chuck still dances with a macho swagger that he needs to part with in order to truly lose himself in a routine.
Score: 23. Another scoring plateau over here.
A bit of a shakeup in the ballroom tonight as Gilles slips out of first place, but we doubt the fans will hold it against him. Meanwhile, Lil' Kim was the only one to venture into 10 territory, and both Steve-O and Ty Murray could be facing a dance-off on tomorrow's results show.
Here's the rundown of tonight's leaderboard:
Lil' Kim and Derek: 28
Melissa and Tony: 27
Gilles and Cheryl: 26
Shawn and Mark: 26
Chuck and Julianne: 23
Lawrence and Edyta: 22
Ty and Chelsie: 18
Steve-O and Lacey: 16