The results are in: After a hard-fought first round of voting, four contenders will be moving on to the March Sadness quarterfinals.
–Kimye Engagement narrowly beat out the Tan Mom Music Video with 52.66% of the vote
–Justin Bieber's Arrest scored a solid win against Ryan Locthe's Reality Show with 62.6% of the vote
–Apparently you guys like breakfast "food," because Shia LaBoeuf's Breakdown beat the Taco Bell Waffle Taco with 65.6% of the vote
–Miley Cyrus' VMA Performance became an early favorite to become Sadness Champ with a resounding beatdown of Katy Perry's "Roar" Video, with 86.94% of the vote
But before we move on to the quarterfinals, we have one more division in Round One to vote on. Check out the contenders below and vote for the story that made you lose faith in humanity the most.
ROUND ONE (CONTINUED)
Farrah Abraham's "Sex Tape": What's worse than releasing a sex tape to get famous? Releasing a produced porn video and lying to everyone by pretending it was a private sex tape to get famous.
Everything Juan Pablo Did on The Bachelor: From making anti-gay statements to generally being a jerk to starting a nationwide club tour, this guy is pretty much the worst.
Guy Who Spent $100K to Look Like Bieber: After $100,000 in plastic surgery, this guy still doesn't look like Bieber...but that's probably a good thing.
Julianne Hough's Blackface: Dressing up as a character from Orange is the New Black for Halloween=okay. Using blackface=not okay.
Lady Gaga Gets Puked On: The worst thing is we're not surprised.
Paula Deen's Racism: I don't think more butter is going to solve this one.
Kris Jenner's Talk Show: This airtime could've gone to something more useful. Like, I dunno, anything.
Everything About Courtney Stodden: From the creepy marriage to the boob job to the divorce to the consistent duckface.
Cast your vote below! NOTE: results might be delayed.