Aside from Unhappily Ever After, a show in which Bobcat Goldthwait was the voice of a stuffed rabbit who lived in a dude's basement and talked to him, there have been two puppet-based sitcoms of note in TV history: Alf and Dinosaurs. We can talk all day about whether drugs, sexual favors, monetary kickbacks, or good old-fashioned mental illness were behind the initial green lighting of these shows but, in their aftermath two things are clear. First, they actually ended up doing fairly well. Second, they can proudly boast two of the saddest and most disturbing finales of all time.
Cat eating, a near inter-species romantic relationship between a teenage girl and a middle aged alien, and the occasional yet no less disturbing moment when we would see the full body version of Alf running through the house. This show was all fun and games until its depressing finale. Here's what happened. What you're about to see was intended to be a SEASON finale. However, the show was never brough back, thus turning the moment Alf is captured by the government into the SERIES finale. This moment is made all the more gut ripping when paired with an earlier scene in the episode in which a government official describes the horrors that await Alf upon capture.
If you find yourself hearing that series of tortures and praying for Alf's quick demise (for instance a heart attack on the way to the government alien torture jail) you're not alone. Unfortunately we both know that didn't happen. Horrifying.
Remember that cute baby dino? "I'm the baby! Gotta love me!" Well you know what you don't gotta love? The way the series ended. Apparently, at some point in the final season the show's protagonist Earl Sinclair is put in charge of an important project at work. A project that he will subsequently totally bone, bringing about (holy sh*t) THE ICE AGE. Yes, that's right. The people behind an adorable show about a lovable family of anthropomorphic talking dinosaurs decided to task their lead character with mass extinction. The show ends with Earl explaining to Baby Sinclair that they're all, for lack of a better term, f*cked.
Well, I want to jump off a bridge.
Which one of these do you think is a bigger bummer? A beloved snarky alien taken away to be experimented on or a talking dinosaur family faced with starving together as their world ends thanks to their dad?