Once you've come to terms with the fact that a stone cold, Jr. Vanilla-loving maverick one-upped the now legendary Taco Bell Shell Licker, thus beating you to your lifelong dream of suckling at the bosom of a Frosty machine, why not take a moment and abandon your vengeful, now Popeye's Cajun Mashed Potatoes-themed vision board, and take a stroll through these preciously hand-picked links.
FROM THE SOUP TV
Kim Kardashian's penmanship looks very "Lucinda Handwriting" font-like. Oh well, this letter to her future daughter is totally real.
It would be nice if at least ONE of these Superman characters had the power to hand-out blindfolds.
We learned that Taylor Swift has almost as many dance moves as men who wish to avoid her.
This blog post about The Bachelorette was brought to you by Tommy's Formalwear!
We saw how Al Pacino nearly hoo-ha'ed his way into Die Hard.
We heard a cover of the Game of Thrones song from the bowels of the earth that sounded like actual bowels.
Who would have guessed that Justin's most devoted fan was the one right over his shoulder, boulder holder.
FROM AROUND THE WEB
Short Committee Guy will slay Tyron's Bodyguard when he sees this. Thanks, Dad.
David Letterman remains diplomatic, even when it comes to rentals.
And, lastly...for a rib shack owner named Flavor Flav, it is TIME.